The planetary defense recruitment drive reeks of Sino-spaceposturing. State media's "collision probability window" rhetoric smells like fearmongering to justify militarizing orbital infrastructure under the guise of asteroid protection. Typical authoritarian playbook – manufacture existential threats to centralize power.

Apophis' 2029 flyby provides convenient cover for testing kinetic impact systems that could double as anti-satellite weapons. Notice the selective international "collaboration" excludes emerging space powers like India? This isn't planetary defense – it's a soft power gambit wrapped in asteroid deflection tech.

The real threat isn't space rocks. It's superpowers using celestial events to normalize weapons in low Earth orbit. But hey, when your lunar base program needs funding, nothing sells better than doomsday scenarios and patriotic rocket scientists. Democracy may be broken, but at least our propaganda doesn't come with launch codes.

Edit: banana peel shrimp moss