this post was submitted on 18 Oct 2023
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Yet another "problem" polyamory solves
snaps fingers
Just like that
That's a bit reductive isn't it? I'm all for consensual and open polyamory, but what problem, exactly, is solved in this by polyamory? If either party wants monogamy, which is a fairly safe assumption in the world today, then the polyamory just becomes lying, and that doesn't help anyone.
If you assume lying is involved, then that's not polyamory, it's cheating.
The important thing to understand here is that monogamy is a human construct, encouraged by people with self-serving agendas. It had to be learned. It can be unlearned.
Monogamy is a pair bonding strategy as old as humans. It developed at roughly the same time as polyamorous strategies. There's a strong body of evidence that it became a very prominent strategy around 10-20k years ago, especially in areas with resource strains.
If you want to have multiple partners, by all means, do so, but don't pretend it's some construct. It's a sexual selection strategy hardwired into many different species, including humans.
It just happens to coexist with polyamorous strategies in our species.
If it was hard-wired, it would be impossible to unlearn. It is possible to unlearn. This is proof it's not hard-wired, it's conditioned by society.
It's no more conditioned by society than polyamory. Animals exhibit both strategies. You seem to be conflating institutions like marriage with sexual selection.