this post was submitted on 26 Apr 2025
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Its the 14th century and you've had no time to prepare, after you're done reading this post you are snapped. What do you do?

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[–] conditional_soup@lemm.ee 4 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Well, staying in the same location? I'm in the US, so... I'd probably try to get writing invented. To my knowledge, besides some of the Central American empires, there's no evidence or even claim of there having been any kind of writing or system for making information durable. I know there's a lot of clay here, I'm pretty sure we could bake clay tablets to store down information. There's also tule reeds here that were already being extensively used, and those could probably be made into a kind of paper as well. As to whether the people would accept that, I have no fucking idea at all; what we know of the California tribes suggests they were always semi-nomadic, but that's all very well into the post-contact period and much of what we know was written down by the Spanish while being the biggest bastards they possibly could to the locals. I dunno how useful record-keeping would be to a nomadic people. It's also entirely possible the people would be like "uh, yeah, we know how to write, dummy", and it was just lost in the multiple waves of pandemics.

I think probably something that -might- be achievable is figuring out glass. I'm mostly sure that if the native Americans had glass, we would have seen some sign of it in the archeological record by now. I'm sure some smarty pants is going to come along and tell me "you can't just throw sand in a kiln and make glass, you need a special kind of sand blah blah blah and here's 99 reasons why that won't work". Yeah, you're probably right, but I don't know any better, so I'd still definitely try. I also remember reading that clear glass was a thing figured out near Venice when they started adding grass ash or some shit to the sand, so I'd definitely experiment with that, too. Glass is just dead useful -and- pretty, so I'm fairly confident I'd get some acceptance that way.

I would say metal smithing, but the only metal deposits nearby that I know of are mercury and gold. You can't make nails and tools out of mercury and gold.

Also, maybe water wheels? To my knowledge, we have no record of native Americans using water wheels for work (I.e. grinding corn or acorns into flour). I think if I managed to put a basic water wheel together, I'd be pretty popular.

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[–] Lumiluz@slrpnk.net 4 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Depends what clothes I'm wearing when it happens.

If I'm wearing anything that could remotely be seen as fancy back then (which I mean a lot of modern clothes could pass off as), since I'm near the ocean, I'd immediately run into the water not seeing anyone, and then pretend I'm a royal foreigner who ended up shipwrecked. Since I usually wear a watch, have a tungsten (Wolfram) crystal wedding band as well, that would help me in passing off as royalty as well. This is assuming the people helping me aren't brigands. There's things we do and know of that we take for granted that could be used to pass off as someone upper class too, like reading.

Then next steps would be to get to an aristocrats home, and eventually I'd imagine somewhere where I could work with scholars so they can teach me the language and we can work on translation so we can understand each other. Would have to be extremely careful of smallpox during all this of course.

Once we could, that's when I'd finally whip out my phone to trusted scholars and pull up my survival books, books on plumbing, etc specifically, and to explain that this is a special metal and glass book that can hold many books that's common in the land I'm from, and that I can teach them how to build them. But that we'd need to build plumbing because I'd like a shower by then.

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[–] Hobbes_Dent@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Slowly and with plenty of witnesses invent the toilet. But like out of wood pieces like a barrel or ship. Rain barrel on the roof for water. Start suggesting more contained sewage.

Should be just enough to not get dead for heresy or something but live comfortably and help a shitty situation.

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[–] TheDoozer@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Well, I'm in America, so...

I guess I'd prep the natives to help put up a proper fight. Find a way to teach them that white people (like myself) carry diseases and to stay away and keep them away. If they land on your shores, drive them back. Never let them get a foothold. I'd try to convince them that I was a demon that got away from the other demons to warn of our coming.

I'd do my best to make it so nobody remembered the name Christopher Columbus except as the idiot that died because he thought the world was much smaller than it is and never returned from his voyage.

[–] JcbAzPx@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

Most likely, you'd just start their mass depopulation pandemic a bit earlier.

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[–] NocturnalMorning@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Probably die of gangrene after stubbing my toe or something else stupid. Prior to modern medicine, diseases and things we think of as mild were often deadly.

[–] Roundeyegweilo@lemm.ee 3 points 1 week ago

I'd cry, curse god's name even more than I do currently, and then probably die from boredom.

1375? Bro that's the. Middle ages. Fucking kill me.

[–] JackGreenEarth@lemm.ee 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Assuming I appear naked in a field in England in 1375, I would first try to, in no particular order (at first, then a particular order)

  • find cloth to cover my face and hands so I don't transmit or catch any diseases
  • distill water so I can drink it without getting diseases
  • use yams or horse urine to create HRT
  • communicate with the locals and seek a local blacksmith to create a metal tube with metal balls inside it, and mix charcoal, potash, and sulfur to make a primitive gun to defend myself against the people who think I'm a witch or a demon or whatever
  • talk to the women and encourage them to rise up against the system and patriarchy, teach them how to make weapons, about 4 field crop rotation if they don't already know it, otherwise about automated steam engines, weavers, hydroelectric dams, etc
  • march up to the feudal lord and demand democracy, with the fear of the gun and half the population behind me they will agree
  • teach about the scientific method to get them to question things, do their own research, and learn more
  • there will be scientific labs, primitive computers can be developed, we can spread our advanced culture to the rest of Afro-Eurasia, also prevent slavery
  • warn people about going to America and Australia unprepared, go with them in modern ships and don't spread disease, talk to the locals and trade with them and learn from them, don't kill them or replace them. Teach them the tech advancements too
  • Write down lots of things, invent the printing press if not already invented, document human knowledge and encourage more documentation by others

This is all if I have any measure of success at the first things and don't die or kill myself

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[–] ICastFist@programming.dev 3 points 1 week ago

I guess I could make a name as a mathematician, though that'd depend where the fuck I'm snapped to.

I'd like to warn the Incas to not trust anyone with white skin, kill them all on sight and NEVER let any of them get within 100km of Potosi, but I don't think I'd be anywhere near the Andes either way.

I would basically become a Jewish witch and either build a small community of people or die of some ancient plague, either way I wouldn't be thriving but I might just survive.

[–] ChillPenguin@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

I would make an IT startup.

[–] humanspiral@lemmy.ca 3 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

I don't know how to refine oil, but knowing that its refinable into diesel/gasoline is a pretty good start to looking for it. Steam power easier to figure out. A head start on murdering some sperm whales for lighting industry seems easy enough to figure out. Partnering with metal smiths who might have a clue on making gun barrels, and pipe's in general that could be used for advanced weaponry, would be an easy path to get governments to give me a ton of money for weapons research by just showing them some drawings. Doesn't really matter if I ever figure out how to do it, just the vision of what is possible would make me richer than Musk. Richer if I can help enslave all of humanity to one empire.

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[–] Denixen@feddit.nu 2 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I'd use my knowledge of history, politics, psychology and science to become an influential advisor to powerful lords and help them conquer the world in exchange for living in luxury.

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[–] Onomatopoeia@lemmy.cafe 2 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Well, first I'd have to learn Old English, I think. Hell, even Middle English isn't understandable.

Hopefully I could get up to speed before they locked me up, or worse.

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[–] Duke_Nukem_1990@feddit.org 2 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Uhh anyone know where to get estrogen injections in the 14th century?

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[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

1375? Die from malaria, I guess? Be eaten by an alligator? Or oh no, hasten the demise of the Tocobaga with my exotic biology? Either they would kill me or get me sick, or vice versa. Also, fall on my ass when my house disappeared.

I would follow the river to the bay, I guess, and see if I could find anyone, or anything I might be able to eat.

[–] Gustephan@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I could probably discover electricity, depending on where I landed. Jewelers of the time could make wire, copper was common, and magnets (lodestones) had been discovered. Realistically though I'd be a dumb giant (ie, speak no known languages of the time and statistically I'd have like a foot on the "tall" people of the era). I'd probably try to find some party trick that looked like magic to people of the era then hope that people would welcome and try to integrate me rather than burning me as a witch. Then I'd probably die in a week or two anyway to some disease lol

[–] Kookie215@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

The party trick thing reminded me of a book series called Magic 2.0 that I read a while back . This guy figures out that the universe is a simulation and basically hacks the code; now he can jump through time as he pleases. He goes back to the Middle Ages and brings plastic wrap with him and calls it clear paper, which convinces everyone that he's a wizard. It was a fun read but got dumb around the 3rd-ish book.

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[–] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

First off. Do I get to bring stuff with me? Like say the entire printed off contents of wikipedia.

also, I would like find one or two things that hadn't quite been invented yet and 'invent' it.

also, Also, with a modicum of military power, I'd probably start a religion.

This assumes I have time to learn the local dialect

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[–] WhatSay@slrpnk.net 2 points 1 week ago

I'd go live in a cabin in the forest, again.

[–] Mediocre_Bard@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago

I'm doing pretty good then. Where I live has been so historically abundant in resources that people were able to just sort of vibe.

I would also establish a calendar, convey it to the locals, and warn them of what is to come along with a timeline.

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