this post was submitted on 31 Jul 2025
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Not The Onion

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[–] Mike_Hunt@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 weeks ago

Back to wooded areas for you, my friend

[–] Wazowski@lemmy.world 4 points 2 weeks ago

I'd be devastated if I couldn't watch pyrn.

[–] outhouseperilous@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Does he not have a printer?

[–] 2910000@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I don't get it.
The only use for a printer in this situation that I can think of is printing individual video stills and making them into an erotic flick-book, but I'm sure that's not it

[–] outhouseperilous@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Print stuff to fool cameras. Old trick, finding new use.

Doesn't work well on people, but it's very diffocult to train a model on the difference between printed and real images.

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[–] floo@retrolemmy.com 3 points 2 weeks ago

Put on a base of foundation and try again. You’ll have to use a lot, but how bad do you wanna watch the porn dude?

[–] herseycokguzelolacak@lemmy.ml 3 points 2 weeks ago

He should get a VPN, for example: https://mullvad.net/en

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 2 points 2 weeks ago

He should put lemon slices over his eyes to complete the look.

[–] Sinatra@lemmings.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Pretty soon it'll be illegal to masturbate over anything but a picture of the king.

[–] TokenBoomer@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

Oi bruv, this wanker thinks it’s bollocks.

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