Oh I don't mean it that way, I have always felt like I'm "on" too much of the time and it wears me out, especially in the years since my "big T" trauma event happened. It's at least partially hyper-vigilance, but I think it's also just how I am. Thats what I meant by messed up, it kind of seems like I'm in the deliberative state more than I "should" be (or what's average, whatever) and when the reflexive state happens it's not always at a helpful time.

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 2 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

Well, that sucks and I'm sorry to hear it. Yeah, could just be anxiety issues. I have a friend with a severe enough case who ended up getting on SSRIs to treat it and it genuinely turned around her personality immensely. That might go a bit above the raw psychology of Thinking Fast And Slow (or it might not, idk, I'm no doctor). But one of the things the book gets into is the real physical toll deliberative thinking takes. Chess professionals can burn calories comparable to a pro-athlete planning out their next move, for instance.

[–] YarHarSuperstar@lemmy.world 2 points 3 hours ago

Yeah I definitely need to read this book. For me it's lead to a lifelong substance abuse issue (one month clean from my current DOC (I'm a polysubstance user), cannabis still but that's not a problem for me) in which I was self medicating my intense sensitivity to any and all stimuli including emotional (I'm extremely empathetic and have strong feelings at all times unless dulled by substances, yes that includes during sleep) as well as sensory (my dad noticed first when I was young, he said I was "more tactile " when I was in elementary and he was partially right and that how I thought of it until I learned more and developed a better understanding with better coping skills and habits), along with the way I think being pretty rigid in some ways, for example I became a militant atheist in elementary school; I later developed a more accurate understanding of my beliefs but as a child I strongly resisted attempts to proselytize to me and bring me to church and church classes or whatever it was and all kinds of shit that never made sense to me the way it was being explained by religious people who were not well informed but had strong feelings about the topic. I have rarely felt well understood even through years of various therapies and treatments with many providers for my many health issues, including the aforementioned substance abuse issue. This book sounds like it might help me understand myself at least. Thank you for sharing :)

Btw I was very underweight for years, I wonder if that has anything to do with what you mentioned about burning calories thinking. I am literally constantly explaining in my head what I'm doing as if someone was watching me and asking what I'm doing. I've gotten really good at explaining myself and during my addiction that came in handy, but now I can use it for good, like having this positive interaction with you :)