this post was submitted on 19 Feb 2025
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[–] yarr@feddit.nl 4 points 2 days ago

HP Introduces the Future of Printing: The HP Smart Printer 9000Wearable

Freedom to Print, Anytime, Anyplace with the Stylish HP Smart Printer 9000Wearable

Today, HP is excited to announce the launch of its latest innovation, the HP Smart Printer 9000Wearable, a groundbreaking device that redefines portable wearable printing. This cutting-edge AI printer not only offers portability but also sets new standards for functionality and convenience.

Innovative Design and Features:

The HP Smart Printer 9000Wearable is designed to be worn on your wrist, making it the ultimate companion for on-the-go professionals and tech enthusiasts. Measuring a sleek 4 inches in width and weighing just 7 ounces, this printer is effortlessly portable. It can print pages up to an impressive 3 inches wide, perfect for large-format projects or creative printing needs.

Premium Performance and Reliability:

With HP's renowned commitment to quality, the Smart Printer 9000Wearable delivers superior performance. Its advanced ink technology ensures vivid, long-lasting colors, while HP's innovative print heads provide crisp and clear prints every time. The printer is engineered to handle heavy-duty tasks with ease, offering a lifespan that exceeds industry standards. By automatically locking itself to genuine HP ink cartridges and detonating if it detects a 3rd party cartridge, HP assures the very highest quality in printing.

Subscription for Enhanced Functionality:

HP recognizes the importance of keeping you connected. The Smart Printer 9000Wearable comes with a mandatory premium subscription service, HP AI Cloud Print Plus+, ensuring seamless connectivity and access to advanced features like remote printing and cloud-based solutions. This subscription model guarantees uninterrupted functionality, allowing users to print from virtually anywhere, at a minor cost of $89.99 per month.

Smart Integration and Security:

Featuring HP's enhanced firmware, this printer is equipped with the latest security measures to protect your data and ensure privacy. Each print job is shared with HP's cloud and scanned by state of the art security software. Your privacy is top of mind, so these files are automatically deleted after 10 years and the chance of a security incident leaking all your prints is quite low.

Smart Functionality:

Unlike older devices, the Smart Printer 9000Wearable doesn't include a cumbersome screen or keyboard. Instead, interact with our HP Humane AI Assistant and get all your work done through the power of your voice, whether you're on a crowded train or sitting in a public restroom.

Get Yours Today!

The Smart Printer 9000Wearable will be available shortly at retail outlets for only $1,499.99. Get yours today while supplies last!

[–] Pogogunner@sopuli.xyz 26 points 3 days ago (1 children)

new innovation team that will infuse its printers and conference room kit with AI

We all know that nobody asked for this, the only saving grace here is that both HP and Humane are incompetent

[–] HK65@sopuli.xyz 28 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Hard to make HP printers worse, but this might actually do it

[–] Midnitte@beehaw.org 4 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Sadly might just lead to other printers being worse too...

[–] strawberry@kbin.earth 16 points 3 days ago (1 children)

smart printer? I want my printer as dumb as it can get while still having lan connection so I can print without connecting a cable

[–] whodatdair@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 3 days ago

Sometimes I go into my router’s logs and look at the firewall messages where it blocks all the traffic my printer tries to send to the internet with a smug look on my face

[–] SteposVenzny@beehaw.org 11 points 2 days ago (3 children)

I’ve never heard of this “pin” before and am fascinated by it. It does what smartphones already do but less conveniently? How did someone even pitch that in the first place?

[–] Jrockwar@feddit.uk 9 points 2 days ago

Less conveniently while costing something like $700 plus a monthly $25 subscription.

I don't get how it got pitched either.

[–] somedev@aussie.zone 10 points 2 days ago

It was at the peak of AI hysteria. You could do a shit on the side walk and say it was AI generated, and youd get VC funding for your next AI powered turd.

[–] HurlingDurling@lemm.ee 2 points 2 days ago

I guess they wanted a sort of tricorder pin from star trek but then added more features? Idk

[–] jawsua@lemmy.one 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Will it fit in your hand? Will they call it Palm?

...

I'm still bitter

[–] unconfirmedsourcesDOTgov@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Omg same. There are literally dozens of us.

[–] IrritableOcelot@beehaw.org 4 points 1 day ago

I just came across the lines in the OpenSuse 42 .bashrc in to connect to palm pilots today...what a flashback.

[–] Melatonin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] ashley@lemmy.ca 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] Melatonin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] ashley@lemmy.ca 1 points 2 days ago

Hardly Practical

[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 2 points 2 days ago

This makes about as much sense as when they licensed iPods from Apple to sell with HP branding.