You aren't good to them for reciprocation, though, right? You're good because it is right & just?
Sometimes being good means treating others justly, which isn't necessarily nice & sweet. Are we confusing good with sweet?
this post was submitted on 13 Jun 2025
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This statement makes it sound absolute, but it is not.
The more people being nice, the better chance you meet people being good to you.
You can't make them good to you, but they MIGHT be good to you because you are good to them.
It's a statement against attempting to please toxic people.
But it's also a statement that kinda gives toxic people the right to stay toxic.
They might be good to someone else because of it
Who might be good to someone else because of it
Who might be good to someone else because of it.
Any of those might be you. No farther though. Only 3 chances for it to come back to you.
At work I have to deal with couriers who I don't talk to at length but do see basically every day. My rule is 2 chances. First time is always assuming the best case - maybe if they're rude they're just having a bad day. Second time, if they still can't behave when I'm trying to be civil, they can fuck right off and I either ignore them or get my supervisor.
I want to be nice to people but I want people to be nice to me too. If they can't be, I won't put the effort into it either, especially if I'm already tired (which given I do physical labor, is common). But respect me and I'll respect you back.
How about we be good to each other because it's the right thing to do. And in a world full of people struggling to get by it's what we can all offer each other. That works. If any behavior is predicated on causing other people to act a certain way it's going to have its failures when encountering the great mess of humanity out there.
You've worded it best.
My version of the take is; The world will be on average easier if more people are pleasant to each other. You can't make everyone join in, but you can make the world better on average, which surely is good enough?
Inaccurate to the point of being untrue. There are some people that won't be good back to you, but the large LARGE majority of people will be nice to you if you're nice to them.
There's a kernel of truth in there, but here it's worded as an incorrect statement. I believe the intent of the message is to say something like -
"There are some people who won't be nice to you no matter how many times you are nice to them. So don't waste your life energy trying to win them over."
It just feels like whoever wrote that is looking to justify being a shitty person as their default state. If it takes effort to be nice to someone then you're not a nice person.
I would agree with a bit more nuance. We were taught that being "good", meaning kind, patient, etc., is reciprocal, and rightfully so. However, there are some people out there whose goal is nothing more than to ruin your day, and that goal won't change due to you being any "better". The winning move is to avoid contact with those kind of people, instead of hoping that they'll change their mind if you just flatter them some more.
Yes it's definitely oversimplified
no matter how good you are to some people
But, yeah...