this post was submitted on 29 Dec 2023
648 points (98.1% liked)

Greentext

5220 readers
664 users here now

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] corus_kt@lemmy.world 158 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (4 children)

Swimming's really good for losing weight, no sweating and less knee pain involved. Wish I had a private pool too, you can definitely tell the public ones are 30% filled with piss.

[–] RickyRigatoni@lemmy.ml 60 points 1 year ago (1 children)

My private pool would be 70% filled with piss.

[–] hemko@lemmy.dbzer0.com 31 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

20% cum, 10% shit and 100% drinking from it

[–] pigup@lemmy.world 33 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] Acronychal@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago

Is that Nutella?

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Honytawk@lemmy.zip 8 points 1 year ago (1 children)

And a 100% reason to remember my name

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] RickyRigatoni@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 year ago
[–] bfg9k@lemmy.world 26 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I find it funny that there is an acceptable level or urea in a pool and it's like 10% lol

[–] Chobbes@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This is sort of how everything works, unfortunately! Guaranteeing 0% of something is really hard. Your flour probably has a small percentage of bugs in it, for instance. Urea is a relatively small molecule that I imagine you can find tiny amounts of pretty much anywhere. I would be unsurprised if there was at least one molecule of urea in literally anything you eat!

That said, dear god I hope I’ve never been in a pool that’s 10% urine :(. Those kiddie pools at the water park are probably like 90% urine, though. Sometimes I wonder if by volume adults pee in the pool more than kids, though. I have a suspicion a good chunk of adults think it’s fine or will do it secretly anyway.

[–] Ookami38@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

It's not even unfortunate. We're a lot more robust than we think we are. We have two sets of organs designed to filter shit we consume out of us, and in quantities less than a certain amount, whatever it is isn't noticeable. Also, chemicals used in public pools are designed to neutralize things like that. If the water isn't noticeably tinged, you won't even know the difference.

[–] Chobbes@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Unfortunate in the sense that it just feels kind of gross is all I mean :). Of course this stuff is unlikely to cause any physical harm to somebody.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] stockRot@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago

You definitely sweat when you swim. People need to rehydrate while swimming, even indoors

[–] DrRatso@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I would imagine a private pool would be annoyingly small to exercise in, only ever seen one that seemed big enough and that one was way too expensive for any normal person to ever afford. Every other one has been more like for chilling in.

[–] Synthuir@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Unless I’m misunderstanding you, or there are only extremely tiny pools in your region, any private pool should be big enough to exercise in. You don’t have to be pulling Phelps-level breaststroke times in an Olympic pool; even just treading water is a great exercise. That’s kind of what it seemed like OOP was doing, anyway. Sure you won’t get ripped, but that’s pretty impossible already unless you’re at competitive levels.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] woobie@lemmy.world 137 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Your metabolic rate can be several times higher in a pool or other body of water than it is on land without any exercise at all. Body heat is lost at a much higher rate when you are submerged in water and your body will burn more fuel to maintain core temperature.

[–] some_designer_dude@lemmy.world 34 points 1 year ago (7 children)

So why isn’t “a long cold bath every day” the trendiest weight loss method??

[–] Wogi@lemmy.world 48 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This is something fighters do when they're going extreme weight loss before a weight in. I'm addition to dehydrating themselves and eating clean, they have several different cold exposure methods that causes the body to burn more calories.

[–] trafficnab@lemmy.ca 13 points 1 year ago (1 children)

several different cold exposure methods

"Cough in my face, I need to lose weight!"

[–] Kalothar@lemmy.ca 8 points 1 year ago

Yes, get sick, increase that body temp, increase that thermogenesis , burn those calories. Don’t be weak.

[–] fsxylo@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 year ago

Because it still isn't going to make that extra large pizza disappear.

[–] xor@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

well, it cures ALS at least...

[–] hakobo@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago (2 children)

The ALS Ice Bucket Challenge was wildly successful, raising over $200m and leading to identifying 12 genes that play a critical role in ALS

https://wgntv.com/news/medical-watch/the-money-raised-by-the-als-ice-bucket-challenge-will-give-you-chills/

[–] xor@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 year ago

yes, that is indeed what i was referring to

[–] cactusupyourbutt@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

Im still fuckkng amazed that a social media trend for once actually had a good and measurable effect

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago

Thanks. I've had that theory for years, but you just articulated it much better than I could.

[–] someguy3@lemmy.world 93 points 1 year ago

This is why they say find an activity you enjoy.

[–] empireOfLove2@lemmy.dbzer0.com 88 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Swimming is amazing for the elderly as well as the heavily obese. Buoyancy takes all the load off joints/cartilage and significantly reduces wear or arthritic pain while still providing consistent, firm resistance to movement that burns calories.

[–] Holyhandgrenade@lemmy.world 22 points 1 year ago

In Iceland all the public pools are full of old people. Due to geothermal energy, all outdoor pools in Iceland are heated, even in winter. I think it's a really great public health program honestly.

[–] LUHG_HANI@lemmy.world 68 points 1 year ago (3 children)

When did it change from .jpg to .webp?

[–] Jessica@discuss.tchncs.de 24 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] Killer@lemmy.world 24 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Webp is just a more data efficient format, lots of sites are switching to it because it can greatly decrease bandwidth and storage costs.

[–] Jessica@discuss.tchncs.de 29 points 1 year ago

I don't think anyone here was unfamiliar with what a .webp was besides maybe @VaultBoyNewVegas@lemmy.world. OP was just pointing out it's weird to see a greentext using anything besides .jpg

[–] Holyhandgrenade@lemmy.world 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The only problem is that basically no software supports it, so if you're saving pictures for a slideshow or something, webp is impossible to use.

[–] Honytawk@lemmy.zip 7 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yeah, what is up with that?

Most photo software supports so many formats, and it is not like webp is a brand new one. It is also widely used on the internet by this point.

Why does it take so long to get support on any of them without installing a separate plugin?

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] VaultBoyNewVegas@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I'm on the upper end of generation Z and I've never heard or seen webp at all. .jpg is the one I've seen used.

[–] Jessica@discuss.tchncs.de 11 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Well I would hope there aren't any 290 pound 13-year-old gen alphas out there

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] Ragdoll_X@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] LolaCat@lemmy.ca 19 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I was going to reply with a .jxl meme, but it turns out Lemmy doesn't support it, which is a genuinely better .jxl joke than anything I would've made.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] SeabassDan@lemmy.world 61 points 1 year ago (8 children)

Jokes aside now anon's gotta make sure to use sunscreen, or he's only trading in one killer for another.

[–] CallumWells@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] SeabassDan@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

What do you think this is, a serious conversation?

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (7 replies)
[–] go_go_gadget@lemmy.world 41 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'd argue the most difficult part about losing weight is boredom.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 27 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Yeah. You can’t outrun your fork, but you can’t mindlessly snack because you’re bored on a bicycle.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] doublejay1999@lemmy.world 35 points 1 year ago (1 children)

30lbs in 2 weeks using this one neat trick.

Ok anon.

[–] EtherWhack@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Well, they never mentioned they ate anything in those two weeks, just bobbed around in the pool

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›