Linux
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Middle aged white women LOVE to claim they love wine. I even sometimes see them buying decorative signs to hang in their house that say "Live Laugh Wine".
And yet......blank looks anytime I ask what distro they're on.
Are you drunk?
Man, I wish. I used to drink Whiskey and beer all the time. Then my colon said "FUCK YOU ASSHOLE!!!". Now the doctors tell me to not do that anymore.
You want some beer? No, you'll get cancer.
Want some cheeseburgers? No, you'll get cancer.
Want some potato chips? No, you'll get cancer.
Want to drive a Tesla? No, I'm not a nazi. Plus they're ugly as hell.
I can't even drink anything because I'm literally allergic to alcohol. Any alcohol.
"Hi, it's iFixit! Today we're going to clean this old NES cartridge contacts. You'll need a few Q-Tips, and isopropyl alcohol!"
"NOOOOOOOO!!!!!"
Bro brought the blue tick bot comments from Xitter onto here 😂