this post was submitted on 08 Oct 2025
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Every top assassin knows to start your emails by explaining you are in fact a top assassin.
Noone wants to be confused with a bottom assassin.
If there's a "best" assassin, it stands to reason that there's also a "worst" assassin.
Maybe the worst assassins are all the friends we made along the way.
the assassassin is to be feared
Well it would be stupid to say you are a bad assassin, think it through dummy.
Pull an "Albanian virus":
"Hi, I am an Albanian assassin but because of poor technology in my country unfortunately I am not able to assassinate you. Please be so kind to assassinate yourself and then forward me the proof. Many thanks for your cooperation! Best regards,Albanian assassin"
I relate a lot to this assassin.
Pacifier or mannequin? What kind of dummy are you thinking it through?
(The comma splice didn't have the same potential)
Hmm, I vote for "crash test".
yeah i want to get referrals from the widow and new husband
and saying your name right away is the first thing any top assassin should do when sending emails to their victims.
The names's Bond. James Bond.
Professionals have standards
Top Assassin (in the room).
Definitely in the top three assassins on the street (depending on the street)
Once there’s 47
Re:’s in the subject of the final email a call comes in“Contract complete. Well done 47.”
Another classic Hitman assassination of getting someone to kill themselves due to never ending meaningless emails
All you gotta do is convince them you're a bottom and they leave you alone.
Top top, or like top 10 in the graduating class?
Know what they call an assassin that graduated last in his class? "Assassin"
Everybody knows this information goes in the signature.