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How couples meet in the US (lemmy.ml)

submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by dessalines@lemmy.ml to c/usa@lemmy.ml

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This is really a monumental societal change.

3rd spaces are nearly completely destroyed, and online seems to be the main option for ppl now.

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[–] MonkeMischief@lemmy.today 3 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

all that swiping and trying to maximize compatibility. People are people not clothing or toys.

Exactly, all these apps need the user to be self absorbed. "Who's YOUR right fit? Who is YOUR type? Who fits YOUR personal fantasy narrative?"

Love is about two people giving themselves toward each other, not obsessing over their "ROI" in some transactional economic thinking. But that simply doesn't compute to a CEO and natural human friendship doesn't return 4x to investors every quarter, so it's gotta go, right?

Building a relationship should be out of interest in the other soul, and finding that person isn't what these algorithms promote. They turn dating into just another job hunt with metrics to meet, a "market" of desirability, bullshit interviews, performative fakery, marketing, and ego.

I also met my partner online, but ~20 years ago on World of Warcraft LOL. Younger people ask me for dating advice and I'm like "Stay off those stupid apps and just go meet people who might like what you like and see what happens!"