tl;dr - cannabis is an important pillar of my life. the same is true for many millions of other people. and there is nothing to be ashamed of.
it hit me while masturbating in the shower, i'm never going to be completely sober. i need drugs to function as a member of society. and that's alright with me.
i also know, more importantly, that there are millions of other people like me all over the planet. most of us just hide to survive.
edit:
i only smoke concentrated cannabis. sativa strains preferably.
i don't consume any other drugs. i used to. but not anymore.
i used to regularly consume alcohol, caffeine, LSD, MDMA, shrooms, cocaine and salvia divinorum. nothing like the DMT and designer psychedelics of today.
i feel fortunate to have lived through my own experience of drug culture and walked out the other side.
I feel this way too. And have a similar history of other types of drugs used. Not that I chose to stop doing them tho but really lost access (plug stopped plugging).
My partner is concerned about the smoke in my lungs, which is a fair point. So I do mostly edibles, only weed these days. I still have a couple pre-rolls on hand in case a friend stops over or I don't wanna wait 2 hours for the gummies to hit.
I can stop long enough to pass a drug test, I have a stable job, I own a house, have a partner of 8 years now (wow) so I wouldn't consider myself a "failure" or a "junkie" or anything like that.
Being high is just better imo. I feel better, I smile more, I worry less. The only downside is if i go spaceman and my partner wants to have a serious talk she's just SoL for a few hours but all in all I don't think I'll ever stop and tbh I don't really want to.