this post was submitted on 01 Apr 2025
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Relationship Advice

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It was worth a pretty penny. Ended stuff by cussing each other out and blocking. Have a spare key to his place he doesn't know about. He isn't currently there. What do

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[–] latenightnoir@lemmy.blahaj.zone 11 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Well, a B&E is pretty much always a bad idea, imo. My advice would be to hang on to that key and try to discuss a repatriation of goods with him. You two could work out a way to do this with minimal face-to-face interaction if things are still a bit too raw. You can then "oh, I just remembered about this" the dupe key back to him.

If this doesn't work out, then a B&E stops being a bad idea.

[–] ilovededyoupiggy@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

If that doesn't work out, B&E becomes an even worse idea. If you ask the guy to get your PlayStation back, and he says no, and then the PlayStation magically disappears from his locked apartment 2 weeks later, who do you think they're gonna come looking for?

If the person says no in the first place, that can be considered theft/illegal appropriation of private property. I can't see it being worse to access an ex's home with the spare key to retrieve solely what's appropriate in that case.

[–] crapwittyname@lemm.ee 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

If you've got a a key, it's just E. No B required.

[–] latenightnoir@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Fair enough, although I don't think the police would much care about this detail if charges were pressed:)) That's why I suggested trying to solve things amiably first, it'd be a nice little exculpatory element in case things fall apart and OP is required to... procure their stuff directly.

Although this does raise a good point, in that OP may even try involving the police should their ex refuse to return their things, although they'd require proof of ownership for that...

[–] crapwittyname@lemm.ee 3 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

I think your advice is right, definitely better to settle it with consent if possible

[–] Ebby@lemmy.ssba.com 9 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Police offer civil standby service if you need to get some stuff back. That way things don't get out of hand.

Look up the specifics for your city in case the process is a tad different.

[–] jlyndby@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

Umm how does that work? He'd have to be home right?

[–] str82L@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

You have a key to his place that he doesn't know about? I'm interested to hear how this happened in a way that is morally defensible.