this post was submitted on 03 Jun 2025
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Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

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If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] ImplyingImplications@lemmy.ca 333 points 1 week ago (5 children)

It's all water under the fridge

[–] Akasazh@feddit.nl 73 points 1 week ago (1 children)

A fridge over troubled water

[–] biscuitswalrus@aussie.zone 35 points 1 week ago (1 children)

You could retire off this pun.

[–] Rusty@lemmy.ca 15 points 1 week ago

He is already retired

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[–] LodeMike@lemmy.today 141 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (4 children)

Fake: OP outside their house

Gay: spending time with a man

[–] stebo02@sopuli.xyz 16 points 1 week ago (5 children)

can't be sure but "> at guys house" reads like it was written by a woman

[–] steeznson@lemmy.world 17 points 1 week ago (3 children)

How many women do you know who post on 4chan?

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[–] Sonor@lemmy.world 102 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)
  • me, an icecube
  • finally, it's my day to shine
  • someone finally takes me out of the fridge
  • clumsy mofo drops me, I'm spiraling downwards into the deep unkown
  • when i think it can't be worse, i got kicked back into the darkness i came from
  • fml
[–] madjo@feddit.nl 34 points 1 week ago (1 children)
  • me, an ice cube
  • ugh, no I don't want to leave the freezer
  • oh no! He's picking me! Grab one of my annoying neighbours please!
  • you know what? I'll jump out of his hands! He'll surely have to pick me up and put me back.
  • what the fuck? He just kicks me underneath the freezer to melt uselessly?!
  • fml
[–] dave@feddit.uk 26 points 1 week ago (1 children)
  • me, an ice cube
  • can't wait to get out of this place
  • door opens every day, but never get to leave
  • anon finally picks me out--this is my chance
  • wriggle out of his inept grip
  • make a break for freedom under the fridge
  • mfw the fuckwit helps by actually kicking me further under
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[–] allidoislietomyself@lemmy.world 93 points 1 week ago (4 children)

My brother-in-law did this at my house the other day! My jaw almost hit the floor watching him try to kick that shit under the fridge. He did it in front of his son too. They didn't seee behind them, so I bent over and picked up the cubes and told them we don't do that in this house. I told my wife and she told her sister, they were both surprised. I had no idea people did this. Just pick them up and toss them in the sink.

[–] icelimit@lemmy.ml 77 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Rinse the ice and then keep using it. It's literally pristine again.

[–] javiwhite@feddit.uk 63 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Something tells me we can trust this user on their knowledge of ice and its limits.

[–] Cheradenine@sh.itjust.works 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Between the 5 second rule and rinsing, the ice is probably cleaner than it was from the tray.

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[–] Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk 19 points 1 week ago

Melt the ice cube, boil the resulting water to evaporate it, collect the vapour in a condenser, refreeze it... boom!

[–] isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de 12 points 1 week ago (7 children)

you are joking, but lately i've been seeing reusable ice cubes made of a plastic cube with water inside...

just.. eww

[–] groet@feddit.org 20 points 1 week ago (6 children)

just.. eww

Why? Just clean them after every use. How is a plastic cube different than drinking from a plastic cup?

I have steel cubes with liquid inside (not sure if water) and I love them. I can put ice cubes into beer and other drinks without watering them down.

[–] Strakh@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago

Metal ones seem nice. I agree with the plastic ones being shitty though. It just seems like more waste and microplastics being added to my brain fork.

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[–] icelimit@lemmy.ml 14 points 1 week ago (5 children)

I'm actually not joking, if you rinse an ice cube. Superficial ice immediately melts and is rinsed away. You could have dipped it in engine oil and it would be immediately pure ice after rinsing.

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[–] rickyrigatoni@lemm.ee 68 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] NOPper@lemmy.dbzer0.com 25 points 1 week ago (2 children)

It doesn't work if you don't pre-print this out.

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[–] Jakeroxs@sh.itjust.works 18 points 1 week ago (1 children)

My cats like to lick ice cubes so I'll leave them for them to lick across the floor lol

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[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 73 points 1 week ago (6 children)

Imagine kicking them under the fridge instead of just leaving them where they lie.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 43 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I asked my wife to pick up ice cubes she dropped because it would be too easy to slip on them. I might have lost it when she then tried to kick them under the fridge.

[–] magnetosphere@fedia.io 32 points 1 week ago (3 children)

“Tried”? She missed somehow?

[–] snoons@lemmy.ca 26 points 1 week ago (1 children)

The fridge was a low-rider.

[–] Heathcliff@lemm.ee 12 points 1 week ago

I hate it when the ice bounces back.

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[–] empireOfLove2@lemmy.dbzer0.com 35 points 1 week ago (2 children)

that's how you get cold puddle of water that you might step your socks in. the biggest ick.

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[–] Cruxifux@feddit.nl 25 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Or just throwing them in the sink? Y’all crazy.

[–] ByteJunk@lemmy.world 25 points 1 week ago (1 children)

They're on the floor. How would I get them to the sink?? I don't think even Messi could kick them up there.

[–] stebo02@sopuli.xyz 16 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (5 children)

So there's these things halfway up your legs and they're called knees. These can bend so that you can lower your upper body towards the floor, allowing your arms to reach the ice cube when extended.

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[–] Cheradenine@sh.itjust.works 22 points 1 week ago (4 children)

This is my cats job. If he hears an ice cube fall he will run in, find it, and start batting it around the floor. Within seconds it's under the fridge.

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[–] nickwitha_k@lemmy.sdf.org 57 points 1 week ago

Maybe it's because I've mainly lived in temperate climates but this seems like a great way to get a lot of mold under your fridge.

[–] nutsack@lemmy.dbzer0.com 39 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

girls are so annoying i am constantly wikipedia printout page

[–] ameancow@lemmy.world 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I keep at least twenty printed articles in several drawers throughout my house to preemptively head-off any and all arguments that may arise from situations that may arise contextually from events that could take place in that room.

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[–] FiskFisk33@startrek.website 37 points 1 week ago (11 children)
[–] lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org 14 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Counter-print-out-a-wikipedia-page

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[–] Irelephant@lemm.ee 34 points 1 week ago

Fictictous and Homosexual, anon is trying to scare off the girl.

[–] GooberEar@lemmy.wtf 31 points 1 week ago (4 children)

I'm trying really hard not to comment something like "Welcome to one of many, many joys of living with an immature teenage child."

Kicking the ice under the fridge is actually one of the least aggravating of the shitty things to do in the kitchen, but so indicative of what type of person they are. Other well-known classics include leaving a microscopically small portion of milk in the carton to avoid having to rinse the thing out and place it in the recycle bin and using the last clean cup in the cabinet so that you don't have to bring one of the dozen+ dirty cups you've accumulated in your room to the kitchen to be cleaned for reuse. Oh, and let's not forget drop a spoon of peanut butter the floor and leave it for the dog to clean up even though you know she's allergic to it so it makes her throw up and then later on causes a bunch of skin issues for her.

No, I'm not the least bit bitter. Why do you ask?

why would a milk carton need to be rinsed before recycling?

[–] ameancow@lemmy.world 29 points 1 week ago (7 children)

I have a relative, full grown adult, they threw away a big-gulp cup almost entirely filled with ice into my trash. I do not have industrial trash-bags, I am not a mall, we do not have wheeled bins to collect solid and fluid waste at the end of the day. I have flimsy dollar-store trash can liners, because like most people, I am but a human of limited means.

I grabbed the cup and asked them why they did that. They stared at me without a hint of recognition or understanding. I pressed.

"The cup full of ice, why did you throw it away in the trash? The sink is two feet away."

Still puzzled. "So? it's just ice."

"WHAT IS ICE MADE OF?"

They shrugged. I sighed and let it go.

This story doesn't end there though. Because it led me to the most depressing epiphany of my adult life, which is that people broadly are not thinking. And I don't mean it in an edgy "I'm smarter than everyone" way, because I realized I am equally unthinking about a vast number of things, it's just that most people run on autopilot through their entire day, their entire week, their entire lives. You can be very, very smart and educated, and still not think.

So what is thinking then? It's conscious narrative exploration of current events in one's head, using language, using questions, using tools to rapidly explore the world around you as you move through it. I realized that I do that constantly (and that's also considered being on the spectrum.) It's why I don't throw full cups of liquid into other people's trash bags, but it's also why I'm miserable and overthink everything and have severe anxiety. No filter, no autopilot.

Our population only "thinks" when they're struggling, trying to overcome an obstacle, and for most of us, our obstacles are so abstract and hard to quantify that we just ride through our days. Capitalism has fueled an incentive to seek comforts and conveniences, so the vast majority of our day is in pursuit of comfort and conveniences, so we can stop thinking. The reward we seek is also our doom.

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[–] moonlight6205@lemm.ee 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] Mustakrakish@lemmy.world 26 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Next look up the wiki pages for mildew and mold.

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[–] RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world 17 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I do this occasionally, but I live in Arizona.

[–] ameancow@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Ah, then you're nurturing the community of scorpions and centipedes. Best to do that so they don't start an uprising.

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[–] alphapuggle@programming.dev 13 points 1 week ago

This is a power move ngl

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