this post was submitted on 19 Oct 2025
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No Stupid Questions

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I've never understood the appeal, or how it works.

  • do people just wake up and start consuming food/drink without brushing their teeth & washing their face?
  • if not, do they get out of bed to wash up and then get back in bed to eat!?
  • what's the appeal? I get liking someone else making your breakfast, but why is having it in bed fun?
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[–] crimsonpoodle@pawb.social 10 points 1 day ago

Hmm like I get you should brush your teeth but, why would you brush your teeth before you eat in the morning?

[–] brax@sh.itjust.works 19 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Wtf... Who brushes their teeth BEFORE they eat?! That's like wiping your ass before you shit

[–] fadedmaster@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 day ago

I think that's actually what dentists recommend (brushing before eating not wiping before you shit). I can't remember the details fully but I thought it had something to do with particles of food getting pushed into spots it shouldn't if you brush right after. Toothpaste is meant to protect your teeth, so brushing after eating probably more like waxing a dirty car than wiping before you shit.

Yeah, I literally gagged when I read that.

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[–] HobbitFoot@thelemmy.club 8 points 1 day ago

do people just wake up and start consuming food/drink without brushing their teeth & washing their face?

Yes. I also generally eat breakfast before showering or brushing my teeth.

what's the appeal? I get liking someone else making your breakfast, but why is having it in bed fun?

It is an extremely lazy way to get breakfast. You don't even have to move out of bed to eat.

[–] Shadow@lemmy.ca 94 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Why would you have to wash your face before eating? Or brush your teeth? You can do it after.

[–] scripty@lemmy.ca 14 points 2 days ago (4 children)

I suppose you don't HAVE to. But I find it unhygienic to eat before brushing my teeth as soon as I wake up. Might just be my personal issue. 🤷‍♂️

[–] brossman@infosec.pub 82 points 2 days ago (8 children)

that's like wiping before you shit

[–] magic_lobster_party@fedia.io 4 points 2 days ago

One reason we brush our teeth is to apply a protective coating. Brushing your teeth immediately after eating can damage your teeth.

A more appropriate analogy is asking whether you’re jumping in a pool of mud before waxing your shoes.

[–] RebekahWSD@lemmy.world 12 points 2 days ago (3 children)

I was told by a dentist to brush my teeth before eating. So at least one dentist would disagree with that I guess?

[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 1 points 21 hours ago

The heck? I thought both eating and brushing sort of soften your teeth temporarily, so better not to eat right after brushing OR brush immediately after eating.

[–] scytale@piefed.zip 26 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I’ve read that it helps protect your teeth from all the acidic food you’re gonna eat for breakfast, not necessarily for “hygiene” purposes.

[–] Veedem@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago

When you brush your teeth and don’t use mouthwash right after, the tooth paste forms a protective barrier to help prevent erosion and acid damage.

[–] AmidFuror@fedia.io 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)

That's the 1 in 5 dentists who don't recommend a fluoride toothpaste.

[–] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Dentist: "Use toothpicks, shove em under your gums! Use the blood as your toothpaste! You can even do it to other stuff, too, like digging out a bladder stone!"

Me, in the chair in the office: 😐😶😯🫨

please.

bladder stones you gotta use salad tongs

[–] WhatGodIsMadeOf@feddit.org 3 points 2 days ago

Wait... That's not normal? I wipe my whole body down before hand.

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[–] iii@mander.xyz 24 points 2 days ago

For me it's the other way around. After eating I want to clean my teeth.

Vibes based hygiene

[–] TwistedTurtle@sh.itjust.works 18 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

The taste of toothpaste lingers for a while and ruins the flavor of breakfast, especially orange juice.

The Way™ is Coffee/tea/juice to temporarily overwrite that morning breath feeling, then breakfast, then brushing teeth.

[–] fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 2 days ago (2 children)

The way™️ is to drink enough water and actually brush before bed. If you’re sufficiently hydrated, and you don’t have all that bacteria shitting up your mouth then your morning breath will be a lot less stanky.

[–] Bo7a@piefed.ca 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Dude. I'm getting near to 50 years old. Thinking about water after 7pm is a recipe for 10x bathroom trips in the night.

[–] JigglySackles@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Might be sleep apnea, or something similar, that is preventing the slowing of your body producing urine while sleeping. Talk to a doc. Getting apnea treated solves this for many.

[–] AmidFuror@fedia.io 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Your way is to have to pee all night.

[–] fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I'm not saying drink a gallon right before bed. Drink plenty of water throughout the day, then slowly less and less until it's about bed time. Then take a fat piss before you go to bed.

[–] AmidFuror@fedia.io 3 points 2 days ago

Instructions unclear. Urinated on hooker and got charged extra.

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[–] magic_lobster_party@fedia.io 12 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I brush my teeth as soon I wake up to get rid of morning breath (possibly due to dry mouth)

i brush my teeth after breakfast. maybe it's half an hour after waking. maybe it's noon. it doesn't really matter

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[–] Nemo@slrpnk.net 43 points 2 days ago

I brush after eating, never before.

My face isn't dirty after sleeping.

The appeal is that someone else is taking care of you, to the degree of getting up hours earlier to cook for you.

[–] SirSamuel@lemmy.world 28 points 2 days ago

My wife has an autoimmune syndrome that makes stairs painful in the morning. I wake up, make coffee, bring her coffee and a snack, and about an hour later when I know she's awake I bring her breakfast in bed. We eat together and talk about what we'll do for our respective days, and if there's anything we need to coordinate for the day that's when we talk about it. By the time she's done with that she's mobile enough to do some stretches and loosen up enough to walk.

As someone else said, coffee for morning breath, eat breakfast, then brush teeth. It's about being served breakfast as soon as your ready to sit up in bed

[–] wesker@lemmy.sdf.org 46 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I don't like it because crumbs and spills in bed, and because it's not a great position for intake and digestion.

[–] cRazi_man@europe.pub 15 points 2 days ago (1 children)

This. Breakfast in bed is totally overrated.

Top tier breakfast as a kid was taking the blanket to the couch after waking up and sitting in front of the TV and mom brining breakfast there. Its the same now....best breakfast is sitting upright in the lounge, although control of crumbs remains a problem.

[–] T156@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

IMO the appeal isn't the actual breakfast in bed, it's having your partner care for you enough to make you breakfast and bring it to you.

[–] owenfromcanada@lemmy.ca 42 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I imagine it's a luxury from the days before our current standards of climate control.

Imagine you don't have a central heating unit--you've got fireplaces, and that's it. You wake up, and it's a brisk 8°C in your house. Staying in your nice cozy bed might not sound so bad.

It may also be a leftover thing from days when people couldn't afford to stay in bed in the morning. Only the rich could afford to lounge around that way, so having that once a year would have been a way to treat someone like royalty.

[–] scripty@lemmy.ca 7 points 2 days ago

Yup, this makes sense.

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 3 points 1 day ago

It probably started with one person getting up earlier, making coffee, and bringing back coffee and some small pastry or something. That would be easy to deal with, and a nice wake up.

Then it turned into this whole thing where they bring a tray with all this stuff on it, including a vase with a flower, and it's all wobbly and spilling, and you have sit up with your legs out straight, unable to properly lean back against something, etc. It was a nice thought, but way more trouble than it's worth.

Just bring me some coffee, please.

[–] pseudo@jlai.lu 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I've got the same question.

You could sit confortably to eat on a bed. But you can't do it in the bed. And whatever is your posture to eat, it is one you'll take to chill in a bed. So what the point? Why put crumbs, sticky stuff and beverage to a bed that will to be confortable ?

[–] Artisian@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago (2 children)

For the real fancy experience, you can use a bed tray. Example

[–] pseudo@jlai.lu 3 points 2 days ago

I know them but don't think they solve anything.

[–] Jakeroxs@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 days ago

Bed tray is the way

[–] JigglySackles@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

I don't like breakfast in bed either. Would much rather get my day going first. Brush teeth, take a piss, get some lazy clothes on etc. I wouldn't mind a couch breakfast, but only if I don't have to cut anything. If I need a knife, please let's just do this at the table. I'll appreciate the gesture just as much and won't be struggling half conscious to keep my bed clean with a wobbly ass tray.

[–] givesomefucks@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

It's about someone putting all the effort in so it's ready for you.

I wouldn't give a shit either and don't see the appeal, but it's human variation. Like, you probably don't really see the appeal of going out to eat with friends, and would rather do some other activity with them that you do enjoy.

But for the majority of people, food is currency, and eating in front of people shows that you're not going to just take all the food for yourself and you're willing to provide for someone who (in the moment) has none.

You're not going to really get a logical answer, it's just leftover instincts from billions of years of evolution. Like how your dog isn't freaking out in excitement over a treat, they're happy because you are choosing to give them "your" food. Even if it's the smallest piece they inhale without tasting. It was yours and you gave it to them. It re-enforces the bond.

The intent is what matters. You value who you share your food with, so who you share food with feels valued by you.

[–] scripty@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 days ago (2 children)

I totally get all of that. Wouldn't all of that hold true if you were having breakfast on a table/kitchen island too though? I'm specifically confused about what makes having it in bed special.

[–] givesomefucks@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago

Because it's there for you as soon as you wake up.

The other person (assumedly) got up early, obtained food, and prepared it just for you, without you signalling that you wanted it. Something that in modern times isn't that big of a deal because it's just in the kitchen.

But it shows they thought of you and your needs on their own. They thought of you when you were unconscious and took steps to ensure your comfort and survival. It's such a base thing that it still really matters.

Like I said, it's not really a logical thing that it should matter so much, because food is a lot more accessible. It's an evolutionary holdover from long before humans or even primates existed. And due to natural variation some people just won't see any point in it, where to other people it's still a huge sign of love.

Like, if you asked why facial symmetry is attractive, most people couldnt explain it. But they still enjoy looking at a symmetrical face even if they don't know why. And humans are really bad at just guessing and then rationalizing. So they'll come up with some bullshit and honestly believe it.

So logically table or bed doesn't matter. But brains aren't logical. That boost of it being there the instant you get woken up is what matters most. It's a sign that even when you're not physically present the other person will care about you.

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

From the perspective of a traditional woman's role, it's a luxury offered by a caring husband or child. Women traditionally got out of bed and started breakfast for the rest of the family. Breakfast in bed is a reversal of that role.

"It's OK mom/honey. You don't have to get up today. Stay in bed and enjoy yourself."

I think it's more of trope than a thing people do now days.

[–] MarieMarion@literature.cafe 8 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

So :
Yes, I wash up after breakfast anyway.

No. I resent even having to go pee.

I love not having to get up, saying toasty in bed (my house gets very cold 6 months a year--around 12C). Also, we tend to make better breakfasts in those cases. With a flower from the garden and everything.

Additionally, in my 9 year old's case: since she was born, she had at least 80% of her breakfasts in bed. She likes to wake up slow, she reads for a while after waking up, and since she started middle school her days are hectic, so we pamper her that way. It's twenty minutes of comfort before she starts her 10-hour days.

[–] BeatTakeshi@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago

It's a good deal when offered

[–] xiao@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 days ago

Only when I am confined to bed. But even in this case, washing your face in the morning is a must...

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