Nasan

As a kid, I thought the Midwest was Montana, the Dakotas, Wyoming, Nebraska, Colorado and Kansas.

Tangentially perhaps, what they're talking about is related to pig butchering scams running out of "business parks" situated along the border with Thailand (in Cambodia and Myanmar). The people operating the scams are essentially kidnap victims lured with false job listings and coerced into working to pay off phony debts. Many of these are Chinese nationals but it seems to be a pretty mixed bag.

The article focuses on Chinese nationals seeking to leave the country to travel somewhere with casinos. Remote casino resorts have been sprouting up around various parts of Southeast Asia over the last decade or so. Many of these are also situated not far from the border with Thailand, but I've only heard of Chinese casinos in Myanmar and Laos. Casinos are illegal in Thailand so these attract Thai nationals as well as tourists looking to pass through Thailand to evade suspicion.

The owners/operators of these fraud centers and casinos are thought to related or even one and the same groups of Chinese "investors"/"businessmen". This is largely anecdotal speculation however, as I'm not able to provide a reliable source for the connection here.

I've seen kids set up a lemonade stand trying to sell Simply Lemonade, with the bottle in plain view. I don't understand kids these days

Not just South Park, in BASEketball there's a Hawaiian luau scene where one of the characters gives a big speech that ends the animosity between the two main characters.

Washington does (did? [Haven't lived there for 10+ years]) something similar with birthdate where your birth year and 2 specific digits of the ID # are supposed to add up to 100. They teach it at the class you're required to take to get a permit to serve alcohol.

He was trying to get past the bouncer at the Salty Spitoon

Global temperature seems to be (put on sunglasses) spiraling out of control.

This is true to cosmonauts well before they get anywhere near spacecraft

Possbilieie

What is this? A couch for ants?!

Every scratch ticket is a winner, but the prize is always less than the cost of the scratch ticket.

They mostly ask if my mother knows that I'm out