I used to use Wireguard, but Tailscale is a lot easier and has a lot of useful features. Tailscale is built on top of Wireguard but automates all the configuration - all you need to do is install it and log in on all devices. It handles NAT traversal using techniques like UDP hole punching, so you don't need to configure port forwarding and it works behind firewalls.
What do you want to run in a VM that can't run in Docker? If you're using a VPN for torrents or whatever, you can easily use Gluetun and configure the Docker containers so that only done of them use Gluetun's VPN connection, while the other containers directly connect to the internet.
I like Unraid. It supports Docker, VMs (via KVM), and Linux containers (via LXC), and has a nice UI to configure them. It's a paid piece of software, but works very well. Proxmox is also very good and free, but it doesn't directly support Docker.
If you deal with a lot of paperwork, paperless-ngx and paperless-ai are very good for managing it. I bought a good scanner (edit: it's a ScanSnap iX1600) and have been digitizing a bunch of paperwork. I feel like a proper adult now lol
Maybe something for recipe management - Mealie or Tandoor?
Audiobookshelf for audiobooks and podcasts.
Healthchecks and Uptime Kuma for monitoring and alerting when things go down.