this post was submitted on 28 Oct 2025
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[–] tigeruppercut@lemmy.zip 11 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Beyond disappointed that none of our resident fart accounts have commented in this thread. Clearly the clarion call of the wind broken by the fart golems haven't yet echoed deep enough into the halls of lemmy to reach their noses.

@Fartswithanaccent@lemmy.world
@Fartographer@lemmy.world
@I_fart_glitter@lemmy.world
@Satansmaggotycumfart@lemmy.world

[–] fartographer@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

I am butt a servant who announces the impending arrival of my lord, Poo.

[–] fartsparkles@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago

Who can murder someone with a PC this excellent?

Professor Belvedere “Fartsparkles” Tinkletuft was once a respected lecturer at the Neverwinter Arcane Academy. His groundbreaking research into “transmogrified odoriferous manifestations” (or, as the students called it, fart magic) was dismissed as childish and “in poor taste.”

In protest, the Professor vowed to prove that flatulence is the ultimate illusion. Through alchemical experimentation, he discovered how to weaponize his digestive essence into arcane displays — clouds of glittering gas, illusionary stink beasts, and even gaseous duplicates of himself.

Now he roams the realms, performing “scientific demonstrations” and occasionally saving the world — usually by accident.

[–] I_Fart_Glitter@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Hey don’t leave out my name sibling

@FartSparkles@lemmy.world

[–] Stamets@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Am definitely surprised by I_Fart_Glitter considering I know them personally lol

[–] I_Fart_Glitter@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Ah, but you also know that much as I would like to, I have no experience with RPGs.

I’m intimidated by all the rules and details and worry that an old, though sparkly✨ fart like me would fair as well as a boomer trying a smart phone for the first time. 🤷‍♀️

[–] Stamets@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 2 days ago

I can fix you.