Maybe teach that fungus how to photosynthesize.

Or cell scale fusion.

imagine going on an Antarctic or space mission and your fucking PPE starts fermenting

Michael Crichton called it in Andromeda Strain lol

The thing is that even if there isn't much energy in plastic to be extracted, theres still enough energy in it to make a viable food source. Now, consider the humble koala and its primary food source, fucking eucalyptus leaves. Eucalytis is such a dogshit food source that koalas had to spend evolutionary time and energy just to spec into it. To the point they cant eat anything else pretty much. Combine that with the fact that eucalyptis leaves are so devoid of nutrients that the koala has to spend all day every day just snacking on them to not die of malnutrition.

Why? Why would a species even bother with this flim-flam if eucalypti sucks that bad as a food source? The answer is: Food scarcity. Because eucalytis grows everywhere where koalas live and because nobody else is bothering to tap into the food source, this sets up a ecological niche by pretty much gaurenteeing any animal that sucessfully finds a way to make it work will have unlimited amounts of food/energy just from the fact theres so damn much of it and nothing else wants to/can touch it. Sure koalas might have paid the price by sacrificing some brain wrinkles but who needs higher intelligence when you have leaves to snack on and sex to make babies.

A similar thing happened with trees and mushrooms. In the deep evolutionary history of our planet trees were once the apex forms of life with forest covering pretty much the whole planet. This is because nothing knew how to eat the wood stems for a good couple million years. Most of the coal and oil that we dig up today is actually the preserved remains of these unbroken down trees from the carboniferous period that just layed there petrified never rotting until the earths techtonic movement buried the tree corpses deep enough in the mantle for the carbon to compress into hard rock or squeezed+heated into liquid. The great change in the era happened when our humble mycelium bois finally figured out how to eat wood, causing them to essentially become the new apex life for a time by taking advantage of an unlimited and untapped food source (trees).

I suppose my point is to not underestimate the willingness of life to find new food sources. microorganisms don't need much excuse just a slight amount of selective pressure and a couple million/billion/trillion generations of evolutionary trial and error. Which for bacteria takes maybe a couple of years I forget how quick modern microorganism colonies make new generations but its FAST. Add some science nerds who love to play God/intelligent evolution with CRISPR tek and gene tagging, yeah for sure well get plastic eating microbes figured out. Then begins the pandoras box of plastic rotting when we dont want it to.

Blood benchies for the blood god!

That's very different though. Nobody claims that the chemicals used in plastic manufacturing are biologically inert, just that the final result is.

Dupont wasn't dumping Lego bricks into the pond. They were leaking liquid chemicals.

Edit: I'm presuming because "This content in unavailable in your area".

Interesting. I had only heard about how it "MAY" be harmful before, which means nothing.

Danke für die Korrektur.

This sounds like a way to die in one of the Space Quest games lol.

Sound like a futuristic black-mirror-esque solution to blood donation motivation.

At Blood-B-Kleen, our machine will quickly and safely pull 8 pints of raw dirty blood from your vein and will return 7 pints of your cleaned blood with 99% reduction in plastics and PFAS, plus some hydrating fluids and vitamins. We don’t even charge you for it yet!

So a racecar?

When it comes to PFAS contamination, people have been having decent results by simply donating blood often. Getting it out of the system via blood does help to reduce overall levels in your body.