Are we all coping because living is stressful and the internet has fried out receptors?
Or do I have ADHD ¯\(°_o)/¯
this post was submitted on 07 Aug 2025
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Executive dysfunction is also an autism thing. Brain no likely changing topics, starting work on a responsibility that isn't my current obsession is very difficult.
I gave up on trying to find excuses back in college, which was before I knew I had adhd. This then caught the attention of the teachers and they got me tested.
(Back then because I was 18 it was more of a "you had adhd" rather than you have it because only kids could have adhd. But I'm actually on the system as having adhd and getting the help and medication I needed to be the best version of me 13 years later)
I'd likely have never found out I had adhd if I kept making excuses. I take that philosophy with everything now. I'd rather explain things in detail whilst being truthful than lie to people for anything.
The fun part is being accosted about how forgetting to do something is not a valid excuse, and that I really don’t care about person {x} or priority {y}, because if I did then I should’ve done it already! 🙃
That hurts, why are you doing this to me? :(
I've always said that having ADHD is like being a superhero's alter ego.
You're always late, falling behind, or not mentally present, and you can never tell people the real reason.
"Um... There was a disturbance."
Except instead of the real reason being that you were saving someone, it's that your brain sucks.
I don't think I have ADHD but this is exactly my issue with studying. My brain just does not want to start and I would rather stare at the ceiling for an hour instead of studying.
That's also me and why I dropped out of some higher school. Or why I never want to go to uni even though I'm most probably eligible. Or why I don't do my household chores. Or why I'm always late a few minutes. Or why it's always "one more beer/episode/game/cigarette" before going to bed. There's just so much that's marginally more interesting than the things that matter! I'm also not diagnosed and never really felt ADHD but most of my circle is diagnosed and they tell me us hanging out is a huge indicator.
I just have the one more episode before bed and the cannot start studying symptoms. So most probably not really ADHD I just don't know what to do about the studying because it is killing me in UNI.
Don't need to lie if you actually forgot gang gang
or if there was too much going on
Frequently I can't remember whether I forgot or overthought something.
Sad it works that way. Though, I clearly remember why it happens this way with me: each time I told "I forgot", I was punished, so I became a perfect liar: I can come up with a realistic story in so short time nobody ever notices.
Managed to get through highschool with praise using this method. Everyone assumed I worked my ass off while I was busy looking very intently at the parern on a wall
I couldn’t get my boss to understand, and I couldn’t tell her that even though she explained it to me 3 times, and each time it made sense in the moment, every time I sat down to start on it it I couldn’t make heads or tails of what exactly I was supposed to doing.
What I've noticed since I started medication is that IF I do actually sit down to do the thing now I'm more capable of actually doing it. However, actually sitting down to do it is still just as difficult. Which kind of makes being medicated just mean I'm really good at doing the things I'm not supposed to be doing.
This is why my manager made printed sheets of the tasks we have to do at the end of the day. There's an intense transition at the end of my work day (I work with kids, and after they go home, we have to shift gears to do paperwork before we can leave.) When I started, I had trouble remembering and keeping track of all the different things we have to do at that point. So I asked my manager to write them down. She did one better. She made a list, printed several copies, and passed them out to all the new hires.
Those tasks have become part of my routine, so I don't need the list anymore. But I keep it in my locker so I can double-check when I go to leave but have the feeling of, "Did I forget to do something?"
Oh, that is part of the ADHD package as well? Nice to have an explanation to some of my experiences now.
New experiences and endeavors are often paralyzing to start because of this
I relate so hard to this🫣
Activation energy stores depleted.
YOU MUST CONSTRUCT ADDITIONAL PYLONS
GOSH THIS IS SO REAL! Thank you for this, I just felt an immense pile of shame be lifted knowing I'm not alone here.
How do you get through this? I'll go to do the dishes and after washing a single dish I have no further energy. It's like the moment I even consider doing something all the wind is taken from my sails and that's it I'm just stuck and floating. I don't want to be where I am but I can't control the wind, as much as I want to.
Wiresless headphones. Blasting some music really helps me override the invisible walls around doing mundane tasks.
Definitely get a dishwasher. They also tend to use way less water than hand-washing.
Babe I rent and don't even have a garbage disposal
Countertop dishwashers are a thing.
I've bought a small "portable" dishwasher for my rental apartment some years back. It fit in the cupboard below my sink.
All it needs is power, cold water and a drain access. The latter two can easily be forked off your sink.
Maybe that's an option for you, too.
I don’t have a garbage disposal. I’ve never even seen one in real life. I think they’re just not a thing in Canada. I’ve only heard of them from TV shows (where they always seemed extremely dangerous).
I just realized what a jerk I was! I asked for advice and you gave advice and I was snarky! I'm sorry
No worries! I don’t think you’re a jerk! Your landlord is a jerk for not providing a dishwasher!
Haha damn ok in America that is a very big deal you would have been shook. I'm used to it now but it is nice to clear up small build up.
They aren't actually dangerous but I think most people have some irrational fear about them regardless lol
ETA I just realized what a jerk I was. I forgot I asked for advice. You gave advice and I was sparky
in America that is a very big deal you would have been shook.
I'm curious what this means. I'm in my mid-30s, grew up in the US, and have never had a garbage disposal either. My childhood home had a garden and a compost pile, so that's where food waste always went. Then I moved into apartment life. The only time I ever saw a garbage disposal was when my ex's mom insisted that we had one in our apartment (which was a condo my ex was renting from her.) She said, "It's under the sink!"
Yeah. It was under the sink: still in a box, uninstalled. Even after she learned that, she still didn't bother having someone install it. That was the only time in my life where there was (technically) a garbage disposal in the place I lived.
If it helps, you can get mini dishwashers that sit on the worktop. Some of them you don't even need to plumb in. I had one when I was living in an apartment and it was amazing. Just put everything in, fill it up with 3-4 jugs of water (the jug came with it), and put the drainage pipe in the sink. I let it run overnight and had clean dishes in the morning!
Does medication help with this? I've been in the processes of thinking about getting meds for this exact issue for years now...
It worked for me, but I hated the way it made me feel so I don't take it.
Interesting, is there only one main medication?
No. Everyone is different, and there are multiple medications. I can only speak to my own experience.
It's very dependent on the specific medication and the person. I know people who get it and their brain magically let's them do stuff, but not for everyone.
For me it definitely helps, I can do way more in a day, but stressful tasks I usually put off are still stressful and I still put them off. It makes it easier most days to motivate myself to do them, coping mechanisms are still a requirement though.
Defs recommend if you're able to get it. While it's not always the immediate fix it's often made out to be, it makes a big difference.
I'm taking the slow release methylphenidate, the barrier to actually start a task gets lower and I don't feel as drained after a day of work. Downside is it makes me somewhat more irritable, but ymmv.
Interesting thank you. That's mildly worrying, I'm already very irritable (I think because of high BP, that I take meds for already). I know it's usually different for everyone but won't stop me from worrying lol ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
It is supposed to, yes
I've been told it does.
I've got reasonable coping mechanisms, including choosing a profession that works well with my ADHD even unmedicated, so I cannot know for sure. But, even a doctor who has ADHD has told me that one of the most important things an ADHD medicine does is to help with precisely this
Thanks for the response. I'll move it to the top of my get done eventually list lol. Could take a few more years. Although there is so much on my list it's genuinely stressing me the fuck out and I haven't been able to enjoy much lately. It's getting debilitating and I haven't 'found the time' to look up any coping strategies
Edit: after rereading, I rambled a lot and basically repeated myself but I'm too tired to fix it... So sorry lol
It was a very good answer. The fact that you repeated yourself conveyed a lot of information 🦉
It could have been written by me, and it was able to make me a bit worried of someone who's a stranger for me.
But hey, the reason we need the medication (as told by that amazing GP!) is precisely because everything in our life being a jumble causes a lot of anxiety and the anxiety breaks everything else. The medication helps us organize ourselves a lot better, which removes the absolutely by far biggest source of our anxiety. And think what you'd be without anxiety. Or, at least with, say, 92 % less anxiety.