this post was submitted on 02 Mar 2024
650 points (97.2% liked)

Funny

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[–] VicksVaporBBQrub@sh.itjust.works 28 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Better Me will never know the joy of having the Cheetos bag all to myself, and a quiet night's rest with nobody there, and having the world's brightest high quality flashlight in my pocket. Worser Me never has to suffer and endure all that jetlag of constant travelling with supermodel girlfriend, and keeping track of all those pocketfuls of passports, and venereal prescriptions, and custody support hearings. Yeah, I know exactly what Better Me paid to time travel with a ghost. He can go suck a 100 year old egg.

[–] Ashyr@sh.itjust.works 11 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] RamblingPanda@lemmynsfw.com 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] VicksVaporBBQrub@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

A Nitecore SRT7GT rotary.... but nameth her clitoris-of-the-sun.

[–] RamblingPanda@lemmynsfw.com 2 points 1 year ago

That's an expensive sex toy :-D

I like

[–] MonsiuerPatEBrown@reddthat.com 27 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That means that other version of me is worse off than me because at least I haven't had to have been haunted.

[–] 0x0@lemmy.dbzer0.com 38 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Conversely, you're just not important enough to haunt

[–] MonsiuerPatEBrown@reddthat.com 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I'm fine without the FOMO for being haunted

[–] kopasz7@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

*JOMO (joy of missing out)

[–] amoistgrandpa@lemm.ee 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] kopasz7@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Should have jean that coming

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee 21 points 1 year ago
[–] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 16 points 1 year ago

And to think I thought I couldn’t get any more depressed than I already am. Damn you, OP.

[–] Limeey@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago

This feels like a good Robot Chicken bit

[–] FenrirIII@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago

And present you doesn't even use proper grammar and punctuation.

[–] half_built_pyramids@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Plague is good, top tier 2d girlfriends

[–] HerbalGamer@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 year ago

Nah, that's fair.