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Not every man is able to fight, Ukraine is not drafting every available man (the minimum draft age is currently 25), and conscientious objection is a right even in well-justified wars
It's arguing semantics if men of age 18 or 25 are drafted. Of course it's also not everybody who is fighting.
I can fully understand everybody who doesn't want to fight in that war. But how could one explain to a drafted Ukrainian that he has to fight while we financially support those who were lucky enough to have a car and leave the country? The rich left and the poor fight.
I am not arguing that we should return them. I just want to see an argument. What could I tell a drafted Ukrainian?
You could tell them that every human has a right to be treated well. If the roles were swapped they would get the same treatment. So both are treated with respect.
Dehumanizing imaginary people serves no one.
There are a lot of fates we do not know and we should treat everyone with decency that also includes supporting them without judgement. They should not have to prove themselves.
Your whole premise was "how can we justify taking in male refugees?" If there's a million-plus strong category of men who aren't being drafted the why the hell shouldn't we take them in as refugees if they need it?
The Ukrainian MoD refusing to recognise a right of conscientious objection does not mean Germany has to do the same
You could probably tell that Ukrainian soldier that you're going to support him regardless of whether his wealthy countrymen flee or not. If you don't want to return those that fled, what good does it do to the soldier for you to pick this fight? You're not arguing to give him another soldier at his side.