this post was submitted on 25 Sep 2025
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Omg I'm stealing this
As you should, just as I stole it from another user, who also likely stole it from another, who surely stole it from the user before them.
You carry the torch now, and on it shall go for generations, slowly becoming more and more artifacted from re-uploads to the point of being nigh unreadable!
Got the best copy, but I had to dip into Facebook to get it -- shudders
Or as text, don't think anything is missed:
The sentence "I never said he licked my asshole" has 7 different meanings depending on the stressed word.
Just like the crops, in the Irish famine
I am about to find a less cropped version, and I couldn't help but appreciate Gemini explaining the post:
Is that because you were English?
Love the cropping on the B
It's actually 3etter do you have a fucking problem reading?
heat, I like it
I'm thinking 8 as you could stress the ass or the hole
Don't stress the asshole.
Don't tell me what to do.
Better to ask for forgiveness than permission.
Speak for yourself, if I'm ever in a situation where I'm begging my asshole for forgiveness I need you to put me down
You can stress mine, bigboy.
(You'll need to take me out for dinner afterwards. Nothing fancy, some fish and chips will do.)
9 because you could also stress the entirety of asshole
Crop it slowly.
7 if you only stress one word, but if you stress two words it gets even better.
I never said he licked my asshole
Stress all the words!
Used to think Chinese must be impossible to learn as so much depends on context and very slight "stresses" (forget the word). Now I'm thinking that applies to about any language.
Tones is the word, and while Chinese tones are hard they're just part of the pronunciation of a word rather than anything context dependent. The English equivalent would be the stressed syllable in a word, and yes every language has something like this.
It does, it just depends on how it's coded. Like, take word order. If you have a case system with nominative, accusative, etc. your word order can be pretty free, you can move objects to the front of the sentence like 'food-ACC eat I-NOM'.
Remove the case system and it's simpler to encode the words, but word order becomes much more fixed.
All languages are equally complex, in theory at least, but where the complexity lies is different.
I’ve definitely said this sentence enough times to know that there are more than seven meanings, especially if you either shout this sentence or whisper it.
That fact stresses me immensely.
9, you could monotone it all, and you could make the last word interrogative.
Uhm.
I might be missing something, but when I say it out loud I only get 6. I'm not sure which word I'm not stressing either.
Try saying it louder.
- I never said he licked my asshole. <-- Someone else said it.
- I never said he licked my asshole. <-- I was accused of having said it; I've never said it.
- I never said he licked me asshole. <-- He licked my asshole, but I didn't talk about it.
- I never said he licked my asshole. <-- Someone licked my asshole, but it wasn't him.
- I never said he licked my asshole. <-- He did something with my asshole, but it wasn't licking.
- I never said he licked my asshole. <-- He licked an asshole, just not mine.
- I never said he licked my asshole. <-- He licked some part of me, just not my asshole.
It's never and said that seem to be the identical meaning to me.
Some context might provide the distinction.
-
Adam: "Jane told me that he licked her asshole."
-
- Jane: "I never said he licked my asshole." <-- He never licked my asshole, and I never claimed that he did. Adam is lying about both parts.
-
- Jane: "I never said he licked my asshole." <-- He licked my asshole, but I never told anyone that he did. Adam learned about the asshole-licking from someone other than me.
Also "I never said he licked my asshole" can mean I implied it heavily.
Stressing each word gives a different meaning to the sentence and considering that there are 7 words, it means there are possible 7 meanings if you stress one word.
I would argue that stressing "never" or "said" both have the same meaning.
Yeah this is the one that's tripping me up. I fucking hate the only language I speak
Take this helpful explanation from Gemini:
This is funny but it would be better if we weren’t all distracted by the absolute shit picture. I tend to just laugh then downvote this garbage effort whether intentional or not.
This is why I'm sure spoken English and written English are two different languages. Information is carried through vocal emphasis that the standard alphabet doesn't contain symbols for. Online we often resort to bold or italics or allcaps, whatever is available.
Very much so. Ever had a misunderstanding while texting someone? The vocal emphasis is missing.
He never licked my asshole.
He never licked my asshole.
He never licked my asshole.
He never licked my asshole.
He never licked my asshole.
Bonus diagonal emphasis:
He never licked my asshole.