Wait until she goes to sleep. Then get up to fix your arm, get chores done, etc, and go to bed at a more normal time
this post was submitted on 09 Jun 2025
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That's like a metaphor for our whole relationship. I'm out. I'll meet you at the food court.
What is this post even talking about why does your silverware have a pillow
You don't actually spoon the whole way, just up to the waist, leaving a bit of a gap between your chest and partner's shoulders.
Upper arm goes round partner as normal, lower arm rests elbow on mattress, forearm vertical across their back, hand holds their upper shoulder.
Plenty of contact still, but your arm doesn't die, you don't get their hair tickling your face all night and you get to use your own pillow.
This would work if my bed were no lt an unconscious battle field for space; if no-man’s-land exists it will be eagerly taken up, any inch given is another inch towards my partners unconscious goal of making me fall off my side of the bed. Either that or they want to be close to me. But a good thought :P
I don't understand. Can you draw a diagram?
Forgive my terrible phone doodle, but I think this is what's being suggested. Basically, you're groin-to-ass below, but above your chest is not pressed directly against the front partner's back. Instead, you position the lower arm so your forearm runs across their back, and wrap the upper arm over them in a half embrace.
I mean, how serious do you want to get?
Dude looks awesome
I've seen a few ideas like that posted before and people had always ended up calling it things like "the spider hole."
As a broad shouldered side sleeper, I would like to test it out, but I can only imagine what things would disappear down that hole...
On the bright side...
...snacks?
I like your positivity!
That's where my bedside table gun would migrate to.
Watch those nightmares!
I read this in the "Watch those wrist rockets!" way and completely lost it.
😆
Pretty nice though, forget tableside, I bet you could stash a whole ass shotgun down there! :)
wow as a side sleeper that looks amazing. i rotate at night like a 7-11 hot dog i can never stay comfy long so its just round and round all night
Damn that's slick
Shut up and take my money
curl it up under your chin like the statue "The Thinker"
You don’t.
That's the neat part!
I bend my arm and put my hand under my face, thereby converting it into shoulder pain.
There’s nothing more romantic than falling asleep spooning, waking up and softly whispering to your partner “my shoulder’s dislocated, get off me.”
This is the dream ❤️
If I keep it under their neck, it usually doesn’t fall asleep as fast.
Ah good thought
Because of that I only spoon in space.
There's special pillows designed for this that have a little passthrough for your arm and a small amount of sturdy material so your arm doesn't get crushed.
Called couples pillows or or cuddle pillows or something like that. I have wanted one for some time.
Along their back or between my legs. Something like this:
My dude, this picture has clarified nothing, lol.
Took me a while to figure out too! Turns out, it's easier for the smaller person to be a big spoon.
If you're larger than your partner, lay lower in the bed compared to your partner. Your face should be at their back. Pull that cushion down with you to help your neck. If they curl up a little, your arm can bend a bit forwards as it ends up at their legs, and it won't fall asleep at all.
Happy napping! 😉
Also called "jetpacking" (especially if the smaller person is gassy).
What if you're the jetpack but your partner is gassy? Damn lactose intolerance.
My ribcage rests on a memory foam pillow. My head rests on a buckwheat pillow. My arm goes in the gap between the two pillows. The buckwheat pillow is easily remoldable so my arm can go underneath and find a good angle without making my head feel unstable.
Sometimes sacrifices must be made.
I build a bridge out of our pillows. Two bor the base, then one spanning a small gap. I put my Earthward arm's hand up the the gap and my head on the bridge pillow.
Nothing falls asleep improperly.
You're*
The spoons are the same size. Two different size spoons don't fit against eachother.