WomensStuff

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Women only trans inclusive This is an inclusive community for all things women. Whether you're here for make up tips, feminism or just friendly chit chat, we've got you covered.

Rules…

  1. Women only… trans women are women, and transphobic or gender critical talk isn’t allowed. Anyone under the trans umbrella (e.g. non-binary, bigender, agender) is free to decide whether a women's community is a good fit for them.
  2. Don’t be a dick. No personal attacks, no aggression, play nice.
  3. Don’t hate on groups, hatefilled talk about groups is not allowed. Ever.
  4. No governmental politics, so no talk of Trump actions etc. We recommend Feminism@beehaw.org for that, but here is an escape from it.
  5. New accounts or users with few comments may have their posts removed to prevent spam and bad-faith participation.

founded 4 months ago
MODERATORS
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Want to natter but don't want to do a full thread? Do it here!

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ONLY WOMEN AND TRANS+ WOMEN INC NON BINARY ARE ALLOWED TO POST. WE ARE A WOMEN ONLY COMMUNITY

See full rules below

Welcome to WomensStuff! We are here for all things women. Examples include…

Fashion, style, make up Feminism, patriarchy Friendly chit chat with other women. Rules…

Women only… trans women are women, and transphobic or gender critical talk isn’t allowed. Anyone under the trans umbrella (eg non binary) is welcome Don’t be a dick. No personal attacks, no aggression, play nice. Don’t hate on groups, hatefilled talk about groups is not allowed. Ever. No governmental politics, so no talk of Trump actions etc. We recommend Feminism@beehaw.org for that, but here is an escape from it. Please see our twinned community !dadforaminute@lemmy.world They’re WomensStuff’s official male cheerleaders, and great for when you need dad advice or hugs… They’re also a great way for male posters to support women.

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Missing your dad? Horrendous at DIY, car mechanics etc? Want a dad hug? Check out our twin community !dadforaminute@lemmy.world. It’s a bunch of dads giving advice and support to anyone that needs it.

They’re really patient, really nice and they really want to help. They’re WomensStuff’s official male cheerleaders and genuine supporters.

Give it a go!

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Helped your child sort an issue with friends? Problem solved at work? Crafting? Whatever it is we wanna know!

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Most of my girl friends have not seen the movie and I'm looking for some more female perspectives.

Possibly can't get tag to work so just don't read past here if you don't want spoilers.

My ThoughtsI never read the comics, so this is all just how I feel about the movie as a standalone property, with the idea that they expect us to come in with at least some cultural knowledge of who Superman is.

I was really disappointed by the female characters overall. I'm not expecting a Superman movie to center or even really care about female empowerment, but this was bad.

Lois Lane is introduced while professionally berating Clark Kent's work at work. I am prone to some sarcastic banter, but it seemed like a real jab and not actually funny. I don't know that I was buying it as playful, and it seemed like they were setting it up to not be playful and like she actually took issue with his work. I understand wanting to keep the relationship a secret, but why is she with him if she thinks he's actually bad at his job and at being Superman? Then the apartment scene where Clark is making his favorite food for their anniversary. I'm not sure if this is a joke about how men always get it wrong or not, but it made Lois out to seem ungrateful, not that I think she was, it just seemed like that's how the scene was framed. I think Clark would've remembered her favorite, but that's neither here nor there. Then she again berates his journalism and attacks his journalistic integrity after which she proceeded to essentially combatively interview her boyfriend which I don't think is peak journalism standards either. Though I understand where she's coming from with the "you made a decision unilaterally", there's no real acknowledgment from her of the fact he was doing good. If my partner tried to singlehandedly stop a war and save innocent lives I would start from a very different place. It makes it seem like she doesn't support this decision at all even though by the end of the movie it's shown to be the morally correct decision that other superheroes take up. Then he removes himself from a hostile situation and she does the (imho often male) fallback of acting like she was somehow the slighted party and falls into the "I knew this wouldn't work" female trope which I hate. Sure, I could see this as the actions of a real person, and they're allowed a lovers spat, but this makes them seem like just a bad couple. I'm not rooting for them or for her at this point. She then spends the movie relying on a male superhero to do the smart stuff, a male reporter to use his sources and a mostly male supporting cast. She then gets weirdly elitist about punk music, which if you followed the baby metal thing at all you already understand, but is upstaged by Superman's real understanding of punk. She doesn't even understand the music she was just lording superiority over him with. I'm sure it's real punk to ask the president if you can stop innocent civilians from dying. Where was that punk spirit when Superman was actually being punk in the beginning? They randomly go to his childhood home even though it's dark there and he gets healed by the sun. Maybe he asked to go there, but a weird choice though I understand it was maybe needed for his character development. Then of course at the end she says she loves him. No real character growth from her at all so I'm not sure what changed other than he was in danger so maybe trauma bonding.

Next up we have lex Luther's girlfriend. What an all around weird character choice. I'll leave out why they were even together in the first place, but she's just a bad person. She was in a position of dating lex so obviously not great to start, and then she manipulates the male reporter in a weirdly non explicitly sexual harassment way. It was gross all around. She's obviously not doing great emotionally and he is stringing her along and using her and she is withholding information about an evil war plan so some guy will hang out with her. Her name in his phone is of course about a physical imperfection which he hyper fixated on. I already saw that Seinfeld episode and it wasn't funny then. Of course she uses her "vapid self absorbed" selfies from the forced audience perspective as a cover to get information, but it's not because she's secretly good, she's just a conniving woman who turned as soon as she was slighted. Not a trope I like either.

Then there was "confident Latina". She got to be evil this time. What a win for representation.

Then there was low cut top girl. Her whole job in the movie was to be in a revealing top. Thank god we had that jumping scene at the end. Really helped develop her character.

I have other thoughts about the movie, and I didn't think it was terrible, but certainly not a cinematic masterpiece. I just wanted to chat about the female representation here because I feel like I'm not seeing a lot of people talk about it without hating on the movie for political reasons. For what it's worth, apparently Lois lane is pretty close to the comic book version.

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I’m a M42 year old Native American living in north eastern Nevada and I was asked by the moderator to make a post about my experience and life as a Native American. I was born and raised in the current area I’m living in now I'm part of the western Shoshone natives of the newe tribe. Life is alright for the most part. We have our struggles and strengths like any other community. I’m not sure what else to say about myself but I’m open to answering questions in the comments. Love and respect. 🪶

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Imagine you only had one sentence to sell yourself with in your online dating bio. What would you write?

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It's easy to get bogged down by life and all the bad things. What gives you hope?

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Big text dump incoming ...

A couple of weeks ago I completely fell apart; I was ill, and pushed myself beyond my limits. The outcome was the most honest conversation I've ever had with my wife, and the conclusion we came to is that I need to air my emotions so I can process them healthily.

So, I've been trying to do that. I've cried at sad bits of TV shows, laughed joyously while teaching my wife to dance, and this last week at work I let myself be angry at incompetence.

When I was little I had emotional problems, and the solution at that time was physical discipline. Since coming through that I've been reserved and private, and taken a certain pride in being able to remain calm no matter what.

When I was angry at work I was careful not to direct it at a person, I focused on the task of fixing the problem. While doing this a member of my team came over to give me an update on his work, I nodded and said ok (all that was really needed) and he looked like a deer caught between the headlights.

I think I really scared him because he was subdued with me for the rest of the week, I've made sure he knows I wasn't angry with him.

So all that is to say, how do I deal with the guilt of scaring someone? I want him to be at ease around me ... my plan is to take some nice food in next week to share with everyone, but I haven't got any more tricks up my sleeve and I want to be able to express anger in a healthy manner in the future.

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Another week SMASHED! We're gonna play monkeys paw. Person 1 says a wish, and Person 2 corrupts it. So for example... "I wish a million dollars" the monkeys paw would be something like "You only get it when you're 60". Person 2 then says their own wish.

Have fun and stick within the community rules!

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Really proud of your child for something? Watched a great tv show? Hilarious moment at work? Your successes are our successes so tell us below!

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TRIGGERS FOR VIOLENCE, CHILD ABUSE, DOMESTIC ABUSE

We deal with the Manosphere a lot in this community, and we know how dangerous they can be. But when should you be concerned about a social media member?

I'm a dv outreach worker and the below is based on academic articles re incels and lone actor grievance fuelled violence.

Offender warning signs

  • Male, with a history of ACES
  • Misogyny is linked to violent extremism
  • Autism is NOT a cause, but research indicates it is linked to large scale incel attacks. Please note:
  1. Autism makes a person more vulnerable to being groomed to commit attacks
  2. When an autistic incel attacks they usually have a mood disorder, psychosis, or psychopathy

What leads to the murder?

  • Stressor – arrest, reputational harm, trauma etc
  • Most have a diagnosis of Mental health or have had in the past (but there’s no capacity issues and some are just unusual personalities)
  • Lone actor mass killers feel mistreated by a group, or society (often women)
  • Often feel their identity is under attack

Warning signs for attack

  • Fixations getting really distorted
  • Doing badly socially
  • What they say about the target gets more extreme
  • Interest in guns
  • History of crime and abuse
    _ Leakage – for many reasons terrorists, lone violence actors etc tend to leak their plans to someone including:
  1. In small and indirect hints in text messages, social media posts, or other communications.
    2)Can be verbal or visual, and can be specific details
    3)As individuals get close to acting out their planned attack, they may first engage in rehearsals of the act including fantasy writing.

So what can you do?
Google your local crime authority and report to them, they can take safeguarding or criminal action. Maybe nothing will happen, but you've tried... and it can prove a pattern of behaviour which can be important in the future for social services, family/criminal court etc.

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