Asklemmy

I know it in the spec stylesheets but why was this made like this?

"Everything has a name", if something is made, used, discovered or imagined, there is probably at least one name for it.

The cap at the top of a flagpole ('truck'). A single primary vein down the middle of typical leaves ('midrib'). The coating sheath at the end of shoelaces ('aglet'). The creases across the inside of your wrist ('rasceta'). The protective enclosure of a radar, including the nose cone of most airliner planes ('radome'). The square hole in the top of an anvil ('hardy hole'). The iconic football/soccer ball design, that is, the truncated icosahedron with pentagonal black and hexagonal white panels (Adidas's 'Telstar' design). All those different types of cave mineral deposits like stalactites, flowstone, frostwork and moonmilk ('speleothem').

(Any language is fine)

I won’t be able to respond to answers until tomorrow on this but I will come back.

So, I’m early 40’s and had the same group of like 10+ friends since my mid teens. I am unique in that I’m a nerd but also quite streetwise because I spent all my time with my chav mates. I only mention this for context that we may all have been fundamentally different people and it’s just due to a shit home life I ended up wanting to chill with friends more than my desire to just geek out and learn random stuff or pursue whatever special interest I have at the time.

Around 5 years ago I got diagnosed with ADHD and it really got my life on track after medication. At the same time I was lucky enough to land a job on the Genius Bar for Apple and they supported me through the diagnosis and then bettering my life.

I managed to upskill and I’m now a software developer. Now during this time I was still abusing a lot of drugs: cocaine socially, Xanax (from the darkweb) when depressed, and weed lots of fucking weed.

Gradually I started making better choices and not really touching cocaine aside from as a treat every so often. Weed I can smoke at weekend whilst I go rock climbing and not do it in the week and don’t need to do it at weekend either. Xanax I stopped cold turkey and almost died.

I then started to notice that most of my friends were fair weather friends and they didn’t treat our friendship with the same consideration I would when making decisions. So me and my longest friend decided to just cut out those people from our lives and it’s been just me and him chilling together a lot, but now he is really annoying and I’m noticing more and more how selfish and negative he is.

To give a couple of examples:

• If I tell someone I’m going to be there in 30 minutes. Then I’m going to be there around that time and if not I would keep them updating or rush to keep time. He last week text to say he was dropping his dad off and will be at mine. Now we have each other on FindMy so if one loses our phone we can still find it. So I know how long it takes to get to his dads and then to mine. I get offered lunch at home and decline cause I think he won’t be long. 2.5 hours later no word and on FindMy he is still at his dads. So I text to say I’m going out for cause I’m hungry and he is a long guy. No remorse from him at all. He will message sometimes to say come out (as he is coming to pick me up) but I check FindMy and he’s 10-15 mins away. So why inconvenience me and make me stand outside when he ain’t even close.
• again tonight I was coming back from work on the train and we were going to link up, but he had football training and said he would be back at 20:20. I get to town at 18:00 so it’s not worth getting home at 19:15 to go back out an hour later so I said no worries I’ll chill in town and get some food and be back in our town at 20:20. I get off the tram at 20:16 and text to say hey just getting off tram and he replies I’ve got 4 lads to take home then drop my kid at his mums (adult kid) and then he’ll be back. Which means about 21:00. So why tell me 20:20? I just said no worries I’m going home to bed.
• these things happen several times a week and it frustrates me that they don’t think of me with the same consideration as I do them.
• last example even though I have hundreds. He owes me £600 and on Monday asked for another £70 but this is until Wednesday. This morning I put a question mark next to the message that he asked for the money, as a prod to say did you forget. He responded with I said Wednesday it’s only Thursday stop sweating me 😂. Like WTF. Thursday is after Wednesday and all I did was ask.

So i guess my question is how do i deal with the fact I’ve wasted so much time on these people that clearly don’t care as much as i do and that the friendship is one sided.

I honestly feel like writing the £600 off as the price to just fuck him off and do my own thing. I don’t think I can find new friends as I’m older now but honestly I would spend more than £600 paying for things like food and days out on him before I actually get the money he owes me back and it hurts man. Like really bad and I don’t know what to do.

The other thing, and I’ll try keep this the final thing as I know I’m rambling now due to frustration and just being sad, is that although I can be depressed a lot and not want to be alive, not that I want to end it, but I’d rather not be here type thing. Is I keep that shit bottled up and try and be positive around other people and I genuinely always try not to dwell on negatives and use positive intent with people as negatively is crippling. This guy is the epitome of negativity, like just moans all the time. Moans about traffic whilst he is traffic, moans about cyclists even though that’s one less car on the road, moans about literally anything. He could find £20 on the floor and find a negative in it.

Fuck. I feel better just getting this off my chest to be honest but would appreciate any insights, advice, or similar stories that might help me not be impulsive.

Edit: He did just message to say sorry about that football was a piss take, which shows he did actually think about it when he got finished, but he still would have known he had to stop people off before we made our arrangements.

What are things that you look for?

What are some red flags?

For example, I'm incredibly confused about how you're supposedly to measure liquid laundry detergent with the cap. At least the kind that I have sits on it's side, so if you measure it with the cap it just leaks everywhere and makes a mess.

Or at my parents house they have a bag of captain crunch berries that has a new design, where instead of zipping along the top of the bag like normal, it has a zipper in the front slightly beneath the top. That way when you poor it you can't see what you're doing cuz the bag is in the way. Like what the heck who's idea was that?

I've been using YouTube since forever, and it's the only corporate social media platform (beside Discord) that I still use. However, I would like to explore PeerTube, does anyone have some recommendations for good PeerTube channels and other tips and tricks for PeerTube itself?

i have a lot going on besides that. just broke up with a guy, realized i wasn’t even into guys (but it stung more that he didn’t pay attention to me/care regardless), then having some rocky relationships with my gf (open relationship) and long-time friend, the latter i’m cutting contact with. (meaning i will only talk to her if i have to or if she talks to me first)

with all of this, my anxiety’s acting up and i’m a bit (still although it got better) on edge.

I was curious how well it would work for switching between projects at work. I manage IT for several different offices and sometimes it is difficult to switch between my many various projects.

Does the instance a user is on (visible after their username) affect how they are perceived, either positively or negatively, by you or others?

My girlfriend and I are planning to move in together in ~3 months.

I own a small apartment in Amsterdam, my mortgage, heating, water and electricity is about 2000 Euro a month, and I earn 30% more than she does.

Some context: Amsterdam is damn expensive and in an housing crisis, since living here she's been paying about 1000/m to rent a room. Both of us earn quite well and money isn't tight

What is a fair way to split costs? I've heard everything from she should live here for free because I was paying for everything anyway to we should split everything 50/50, and I'm not sure what is fair.

I don't think 50/50 is fair, because the way I see it, I'm going to get back a fair amount of the money I pay to my mortgage when I sell the apartment.

So what is fair? My gut feeling is something like we split the heating, electricity, groceries etc. 50/50. And she pays say 500 Euro a month for living here (less than half what she's used to paying in rent)

Like do the average Chinese people not know the party leadership? (genuine question and curiosity-thus asking .ml)

My father recently passed and I had him cremated. He's currently in a sealed bag in a box, but I'd like to get a custom urn made that's Zelda themed, since we both loved The Legend of Zelda series. However, Etsy has become a difficult place to find anything with how filled it's become with mass produced stuff.

Any one have a place or seller that I could get one made? Or perhaps a reputable seller of just urns and someone who could paint them?

Thanks in advance.

Born in 1890, my great-grandfather had great-uncles who fought in the Civil War. He saw the invention of the automobile, the airplane, two world wars, and saw the Apollo 11 moon landing a month before he died.

I was born in the 80s, I have been trying to take stock of how much life has changed since then. Cable television? Satellite television? Cell phones to smartphones? The internet? Life hasn't seemed to have made much progress. When we get down to it life isn't radically different now than it was in 80s. Just hoping there is more that I'm simply not noticing

What was it about and what made you argue for so long? Did you win, did it conclude in anyway?

I discovered lemmy back when reddit started to charge for their API. However upon taking a look at it, it seemed that apart from like 8 communities,there was not much going on elsewhere. Things seem to have changed since then, quite a lot of active communities these days. So how many users do yall reckon lemmy has now? Is it close to 5M? or perhaps even higher?

I don't have my setup for compiling apps in front of me. just curious if its anything like the apk?

One Woman in the Justice League

Just one woman, maybe two, in a team or group of men.

Also watch Jimmy Kimmel's "Muscle Man' superhero skit - "I'm the girly one"

The Avengers:

In Marvel Comics:

"Labeled "Earth's Mightiest Heroes," the original Avengers consisted of Iron Man, Ant-Man, Hulk, Thor and the Wasp. Captain America was discovered trapped in ice in The Avengers issue #4, and joined the group after they revived him."

5 / 6 original members are male. Only one is female.

Modern films (MCU):

The original 6 Avengers were Iron Man, Captain America, Thor, Hulk, Hawkeye, and Black Widow.

Again, 5 / 6 original members are male. Only one is female.

Justice League

In DC comics:

"The Justice League originally consisted of Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Flash, Green Lantern, Martian Manhunter, and Aquaman"

6 / 7 original members are male. Only one is female.

In modern films (DCEU):

The members were/are Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, Flash, Cyborg. (+ introducing Martian Manhunter (in Zack Snyder's Justice League director's cut))

5 / 6 main members in both versions of the Justice League film are male, with appearances by a 7th member in the director's cut who is also male. Only one member is female.

The Umbrella Academy (comics and show)

7 members:

1. Luther (Number One / Spaceboy)
2. Diego (Number Two / The Kraken)
3. Allison (Number Three / The Rumor)
4. Klaus (Number Four / The Séance)
5. Five (Number Five / The Boy)
6. Ben (Number Six / The Horror)
7. Vanya (Number Seven / The White Violin) Later becomes known as Viktor and nonbinary in the television adaptation after Elliot Page's transition but that's not really relevant to this.

Here, 5 / 7 original members are male. Only two are female. Only slightly better than the other more famous superhero teams, and they had to add another member (compared to Avengers' 6 members) to improve the ratio (maybe executives still demanded to have 5 males).

Now let's look at some sitcoms and other stories.

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia:

4 males, and 1 female slightly less prominent character who is abused constantly. The show claims to be politically aware and satirical but gets away with a lot of misogynistic comedy, tbh, that I'm willing to bet a lot of people are finding funny for the wrong reasons.

Community:

Jeff, Britta, Abed, Troy, Annie, Pierce, Shirley. This one is a little better, 3/7 are female. Notice it's always more males though, they never let it become more than 50% female, or else then it's a "chick flick" or a "female team up" or "gender flipped" story. And of course the main character, and the leading few characters, are almost always male or mostly male.

Stranger Things:

Main original group of kids consisted of: Mike, Will, Dustin, Lucas, and El (Eleven). 1 original female member, who is comparable to an alien and even plays the role of E.T. in direct homage. When they added Max, I saw people complaining that although they liked her, there should be only one female member. 🤦

Why is it 'iconic' to have only one female in a group of males? Does that just mean it's the tradition, the way it's always been? Can't we change that? Is it so that all the men can have a chance with the one girl, or so the males can always dominate the discussion with their use of force and manliness? Or so that whenever the team saves the day, it's mostly a bunch of men doing it, but with 'a little help' from a female/a few females (at most), too!

It's so fucked up and disgusting to me I've realised. And men don't seem to care. I'm a male and this is really disturbing to me now that I've woken up to it. How do women feel about this? Am I overreacting?

I went through the options on the Lemmy and say you can turn off all any display of voting and even the icon for the voting feature. Has you done this? Has it changed your experience of Lemmy?

I still have my ex's bathrobe that he grew out of, and that was two exes and over 10 years ago. It's a lightweight flannel that already had a slightly worn texture when he gave it to me but that literally has not changed in the decade since. It's not that "plush" stuff that gets weird and chunky within a few months, and it's not that super thin knit that gets holes within a few years. It doesn't have any of those whisps of thread that people like because they're soft but that get caught on calluses and hangnails and drive me insane. It's a horrible shade of dark green / navy plaid when I normally go for a more boho / mystical look but I would 100% perform magic spells in it anyway because it is that fucking comfortable. I've considered getting it embroidered just for some extra rizz but I worry it would get scratchy. 10/10 would steal from my ex again.

For reference, I’m not referring to goth rock synthwave but the modern homonymous style: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3DXmTGTzFXidCURMgqM9B7